50 Pick Up Lines for the Corporate World

Because most of these words are dumb so we should have fun with them.

  1. Can you assist me with this insertion order?
  2. I make small cubicles fun.
  3. I would be happy to be your human resource.
  4. You won’t be needing an expense report tonight.
  5. I would like to put your consulting expertise to good use.
  6. Are you interested in managing my account?
  7. I’d like to make you my feature PowerPoint presentation.
  8. Can you help me figure out my operating system?
  9. Where else can you employ that analytical ability?
  10. Hard cover briefcases are so much better.
  11. Your eyes are as intriguing as a good biz dev strategy.
  12. My account is totally receivable.
  13. Let’s get out from under this fluorescent lighting and find somewhere more comfortable.
  14. I can tell you’re a team player.
  15. If we went on a date, what do you think our profit and loss would be?
  16. I don’t believe in automation, I am all hands on.
  17. Your customer interface is impressive.
  18. I would wager that two self-starters like ourselves would have a good time together.
  19. Is that low-hanging fruit or are you just happy to see me?
  20. You don’t need a high level of core competency to know that you’re a catch.
  21. Let’s give you a skills analysis.
  22. Any chance you’d be interested in drilling down with me?
  23. I don’t think you and I will need any troubleshooting.
  24. You’ve been running through my invoices all night.
  25. I was thinking about you during that entire conference call.
  26. I’m not into cold-call sales, but I’d love to have your number.
  27. Can I see the inside of your cubicle?
  28. Who needs a financial analysis when I know exactly where to put my money.
  29. Forecasting is for people who can’t live in the moment.
  30. Instead of all these policies and procedures, let’s visit the idea of free will.
  31. Enterprise this.
  32. Want to play a little document distribution strip poker?
  33. All this corporate giving is getting me hot under the collar-you?
  34. There’s nothing like a little file maintenance to keep you on your toes.
  35. All this problem solving has me wanting to create problems.
  36. Let’s do this, but in real time.
  37. Your methodology is so smooth and deliberate.
  38. Realizing we’re working on a timeline, how much time do we have to get to know each other?
  39. The best part of this acquisition is you.
  40. In all the power meetings I’ve ever been to, this room is one of the hottest…for real, it’s hot.
  41. Don’t feel like you have to go this alone, we can tag team.
  42. Should we debrief?
  43. Performance evaluations are my favorite day of the year.
  44. I am feeling this burn rate in many places.
  45. Sometimes you just have to ask yourself, “Am I a profit or a loss?” Now which one are you?
  46. Now, when you say “team building retreats,” what does that mean to you?
  47. Risk management just sounds like something so clandestine!
  48. You say accelerated growth, I just say hot.
  49. You say there is little margin for errors but I disagree.
  50. The first time I saw you, there was only word that came to mind-benchmark.

Image: mark sebastian

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