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9 Ways to Tell if You’re More Than Friends or His Filler Girlfriend

Holding hands

How to tell the difference between being more than friends and friends without benefits.

So there’s this guy. You hang out all the time, he texts you all the time, he takes you everywhere all the time – but things have never gone to the next level. Are you best friends, are you going to become more than friends, or are you a filler girlfriend?

“The filler girlfriend is someone who fills in until someone better comes along,” says relationship expert April Masini. “Much of the time guys want a date …

What Do Women Really Want in ‘Being Wanted’? Sexual Healing


ColumnWhat do women really want? That is a question that has long been mired in confusion and even subterfuge.

You can blame the usual suspects: porn, patriarchy, and patent disregard for women’s voices through many centuries. But the truth is that “wanting to be wanted” may be sabotaging your relationships and sex life more than you realize.

I first came across the “wanting to be wanted” syndrome a few years ago when I read a book with exactly that phrase in the title. It was called “Women and Desire: Beyond Wanting to Be …

How to Save a Relationship From Falling Apart


If you want to learn how to save a relationship before it turns into a “Blue Valentine” sequel – well, read on.

Once upon a time, you fell in love with your sig-o – and now your relationship’s turning to crap faster than you can say spinster. You’re not even sure where it started to unravel (seriously, where’s a fairy godmother when you need one?). Maybe it was the night you had to cancel your movie plans because of work. Or maybe it was when you stopped pretending to like his sister. Or …

Beyond ‘Fifty Shades’: What’s the Real Deal with BDSM? Sexual Healing

50 shades of grey

ColumnThe entire universe knows that the “Fifty Shades of Grey” trailer was released last week, so if you don’t – where on Earth have you been?

I chatted with Rachel Kramer Bussel, editor of “The Big Book of Submission: 69 Kinky Tales,” about kink, BDSM, and how we can go beyond “Fifty Shades”. You know you want to.


Stefanie Weiss: What’s your quick and dirty definition of BDSM?

Rachel Kramer Bussel: I usually just define the acronym – bondage/discipline, dominance/submission, sadism/masochism, which can …

Yes, They’re Real! 10 Myths About Women With Big Boobs


Women with big boobs enjoy a lot of benefits, but there are myths to be set straight, too.

I feel a Dr. Seuss story coming on: Left Boob, Right Boob. Big Boobs! Little Boobs! Boobs, Boobs, Boobs!

How many different myths about women with big boobs are there to be perpetually and consistently misinformed about? Even in 2014 we still don’t understand female anatomy as well as we should, and no woman feels that more than a woman with big boobs.

Here are some of the biggest myths about big boobs. We’re setting the record straight.

1. They’re not

The Sex Spreadsheet, Untangled: Can You ‘Owe’ Someone Sex? Sexual Healing

sex spreadsheet

ColumnA petulant husband recently emailed his wife a sex spreadsheet, detailing all the moments she’d rejected his sexual advances during the previous month. She posted it on Reddit, where her sexcuses quickly went viral. The Internet had a solid laugh.

Aside from the much-needed LOL we got from the sex spreadsheet story during a week of grueling, awful news, it brings up an important question – is it possible to owe your partner sexual satisfaction in the same way you owe payments on your student loan? In short, no. But it’s …

Women Dating Younger Men: Why It’s Hot


Women face a lot of double standards. Dating younger men is one of them. 

Age ain’t nothing but a number. Somebody famous said that. It’s true. We’re really only as young or old as we feel. And anyone can drop dead at any second, so it’s not like being a certain age guarantees you’ll live another day. So why is there always such ridiculous fanfare over women dating younger men? Are aging vaginas really that offensive? Do we have to call these women “cougars” and make it seem like some act of desperation …

Extinguish Sexual Shame by Claiming Your Authentic Desire: Sexual Healing

woman in bed

ColumnSexual shame dominates our lives — even when we’re not consciously thinking about sex. Shame is so overwhelming that it can feel impossible to extricate oneself from the ubiquitous, all-consuming spiral of it.

Sexual shame is not just what happens in the act of sex, or post-coitally. It’s not the just the “walk of shame” or guilt about casual sex that you wish you could un-have. It’s something you carry around with you when you commute to work, when you’re hanging out with your friends, when you’re relaxing with your family …