18 Best Pickup Lines for Women to Bring that Holiday Cheer (Wink)

Krissy Brady — Tue, 18 Nov 2014 08:00:28 +0000

Ladies, here are the very best pickup lines to use during the holidays.

‘Tis the season to eat, drink and… well, drink. Oh, and finally hit on that cute guy you’ve been meaning to hit on for a while now. Hopefully when you see him at the holiday party tonight he’ll be wearing some terrible Santa hat to make the process less intimidating for you. At least you have booze as a wingman, only…

If you don’t drink enough, you’ll chicken out. Again. But if you drink too much, you’ll go up to him to say, “Hi, I’m [your-name-here],” and accidentally blurt out a marriage proposal instead. (It happens, people. And if your friends find out about it, you’ll never hear the end of it… so I’ve heard.)

Ah well, carpe diem and all that jazz. It’s time to bust out your ugliest, cheesiest, Cosbiest Christmas sweater and do your thing, girlfriend. Here are 18 of the best pickup lines that are holiday appropriate and just might work. I mean, crazier things have happened:

“Let me guess: naughty?”
“Excuse me, can you show me where the mistletoe is?”
“Call me Snowflake, ’cause I’ve fallen for you.”
“Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?”
“You’re my New Year’s resolution.”
“Hi, Santa said that you wished for me.”
“Do you celebrate Boxing Day? ‘Cause you’re the whole package.”
“What do you say we make this a not-so-silent night?”
“How about you show me peace on Earth and I’ll show you good will toward men?”
“Can you hold my gloves for a second? I usually warm them by the fire, but you’re way hotter.”
“Are you sitting on a candle? ‘Cause your ass is on fire!”
“Some of my best toys run on batteries…”
“Other than me, what do you want for Christmas?”
“Call me Rudolph, ’cause you just sleighed me.”
“I’ve got the keys to the sleigh tonight.”
“Are you looking for a tree topper? I’ve been told I’m a star on top.”
“I’m like a Christmas present – you’ll love waking up to me in the morning.”
“Wanna Scrooge?”

What are the best pickup lines you’ve heard during the holidays?

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Image: Attila Schmidt

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18 of the Best Pickup Lines that Never Get Old

Krissy Brady — Fri, 06 Jun 2014 08:00:32 +0000

Here’s a compilation of the best pickup lines that are so bad, they’re good.

Confession: I love pickup lines. They’re awful, yet not. The fact that a guy is willing to completely humiliate himself in front of you and your friends is pretty charming… well, unless he tries one of those trashy lines where your pants never seem to be on.

The only problem with pickup lines is their delivery. A guy could come up to you with one of the best pickup lines known to mankind, but if it’s not delivered with the finesse of Will Smith circa Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, womp womp. There’ll be no way for either of you to escape the awkwardness. Like, ever.

That’s why he has to amp up the cheese factor. The best pickup lines are meant to be bad, since it’s their cheesiness that eases the tension – even if he doesn’t end up with your digits, his adorable attempt will make for a great story. Plus, who knows? His pickup attempt could work.

I know, I know: This isn’t a rom-com. But you have to admit that some of the best pickup lines could maybe kinda sorta work on you, right? It’s okay – it’ll be our little secret.

18 Best Pickup Lines That Never Get Old

1. “I think there’s something wrong with my eyes… I can’t take them off of you.”

2. “You know what material this is?” (Grabs shirt.) “Boyfriend material.”

3. “I don’t know if you know this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend.”

4. “Excuse me, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?”

5. “I’m here. What are your other two wishes?”

6. “My doctor says I’m lacking Vitamin U.”

7. “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”

8. “Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?”

9. “If I received a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d have five cents.”

10. “Wouldn’t we look cute on a wedding cake together?”

11. “People call me John, but you can call me tonight.”