ColumnA behind-the-screen look at the consistently ridiculous inbox of a writer.

At EcoSalon, we receive our fair share of email pitches, and we’ve decided to give you a weekly peek at this valuable information inside our inboxes. These products, people, and services are 100 percent real, although we’re not always sure that they should be.

Enjoy Health Problems While Looking Like Cameron Diaz!

We got this recently from body sculpting lingerie brand, Leonisa: “As Latin America’s best-selling lingerie line, Leonisa knows every woman’s body type is different which is why they have a wide array of shapers for every shape and size.”

Leonisa can help your body type look its best by doing things like taking your pear shaped body that might look like Shakira, your hourglass curves that look just like Kim Kardashians, or of course your Cameron Diaz boyish/ruler shape, that needs extra added curves and create the body you always wanted! (Side note: It will suck in the process.)

What we want to know is what happens when you go home with your date and they peel off that sexy dress only to see this underneath?! Or, worse yet, ripples of love handles they never knew you had engulf their groping hands. We think this is very unhealthy on a number of levels.

Workout With Makeup On That Won’t Ever Come Off…Ever!

Tired of looking like a hot mess during your hot yoga and kickboxing workout? Don’t you know everyone is looking at you when you’re at the gym to make sure you look good? Everyone. Duh.

You better listen up sweetheart and get some makeup advice from the pros.

YouBeauty’s “Cosmetic Chemistry Expert” Ni’Kita Wilson says when shopping for cosmetics that can take the heat of a vigorous workout, “look for the most transfer-resistant makeup possible; it has a better chance of surviving your workout or physically demanding job.”

Uh oh, don’t they know who they’re pitching to? A site that promotes non-toxic and organic makeup and skin products?

“Silicone-based foundations are best suited to exercise conditions,” says makeup artist Kevin James Bennett, a cosmetics expert for the International Esthetics Advisory Board of Leslie Baumann, M.D., dermatologist and author of The Skin Type Solution. “The cosmetic silicone molecules are too large to penetrate or become lodged in pores and are naturally water resistant,” he says.

Right, foundation for workouts that only comes off with toxic makeup removers. Thanks Kevin, or is it Ni’Kita or is it one of the other three names on the pitch. We’re not sure who to blame for this disaster.

(Note to women working out all over the world: Go makeup free while exercising!)

Dr. Umar Wants to Give You a Thick Bush!

Thanks to Dr. Umar’s PR crew for notifying us of a popular spring trend: bushy brows.

(Psst…we recently wrote about it Dr. Umar).

Sure we get it, bushy brows are in, but what we didn’t know was many women have to resort to transplant surgery in order to achieve the look. Wait, isn’t this a trend though? Won’t transplant surgery give you these forever?

Dr. Umar’s PR people write us: “Eyebrow thickness might come in and out of style (think Brooke Shields’ desirable eighties brows versus pencil-thin nineties supermodels), but no matter what the brow trend of the moment may be, fuller eyebrows signal youth. Period.”

I thought fuller eyebrows signified feral children and woods people? Youth. Hmmm…

Did I write yet that the good doctor wants to transplant your other body hair just above your brow? Yes. It is true.

Bushes everywhere.

Image: Rick

The post Better Living Through Publicists: Bush is Back appeared first on EcoSalon.

“The eyebrows are hangers that hold up the eyes.” – Altuzarra’s Spring 12 makeup artist, Tom Pecheux

You’ve heard of the hemline index, the theory purporting that skirt lengths and the economy coincide. Tracing the arc of eyebrow trends over the years, you have to wonder what economists would make of the current fashion for bold and bushy brows.

With eyebrow growth stimulators and serums the beauty product du jour and the continued popularity of be-browed and proud “It” models Arizona Muse and Hilary Rhoda, it seems now is clearly the time of the eyebrow.

Modern Day brow icon, Arizona Muse by Peter Lindbergh

Many of us remember the last time brows were in the news back in the 1990s. Then, it was all about barely-there eyebrows, plucked until they resembled brow-icon Carolyn Bessette Kennedy’s fashionably thin ones, which Newsweek pronounced “very glamorous.”

In the 1930s and beyond, Jean Harlow was the object of brow-envy

In her fluid bias-cut silk Narciso Rodriguez wedding gown and hair bleached the color of corn, Bessette channeled another style siren whose eyebrows were widely copied, Jean Harlow. In the 1930s, eyebrows were super thin – often waxed off entirely and penciled in – a look perfect for the over zealous.

Estée Lauder model Hilary Rhoda is known for her thick brows

According to Tom Pecheux, the make up artist visionary responsible for creating the straight, black eyebrows seen on Joseph Altuzarra’s spring runway, “The eyebrows are hangers that hold up the eyes.” If you decide to plump for the new bold brow, the key to making the trend work is keeping the rest of the face clear of color and making the brows the focal point of the whole look.

If you choose to embrace better living through tweezing, commit to heart these instructions before you hit the bathroom mirror. Remove a hair, and then take a step back and check your work. Repeat.

No eyebrow retrospective would be complete without Brooke Shields, who exemplified the 1980s heavy, bushy brow

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The post Now & Then: The Bold Brow appeared first on EcoSalon.