Need a break from the work week that’s about to end? Go ahead and take that break and watch Tina Fey and Tituss Burgess sing a show tune.

The tune? “You’re Nothing Without Me” from the show City of Angels. Enjoy and have a drama-free weekend.

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Tina Fey made her last appearance on Letterman the other night and boy, was it funny.

Fey honored Letterman by wearing a fancy dress on his show. She doesn’t dress up for late night hosts often. So, to make the night extra special, Fey decided to actually give Letterman her dress, and unveil a pretty awesome “Bye Dave” suit, with Spanx and all.

Give the video a watch below.

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An ode to Tina Fey, the funniest among women.

There is a goddess amongst female comedy writers, and her name is Tina. I speak with some authority on the matter, as I have worked in comedy as a writer who carries estrogen as a predominant hormone. Being a female comedy writer can mean that you find yourself in interesting scenarios – scenarios in which you are completely, unwittingly leading with your breasts, which you thought were stashed safely under poncho.

This could mean that you are on what you think is a professional pitch meeting with an executive famed for his children’s programming, only to be invited to continue the discussion at the Playboy mansion over drinks.

Or it might mean that your agent will be told that the reason you didn’t get a job was because “you’re too pretty for the room” and would be a distraction to the “process.”

It definitely might mean that you’re typing away at the darkest hours of night, determined to “make it in this town if it kills you,” which it might, considering the two-buck Chuck your body can now process as handily as plasma.

But there is a beacon of hope on the horizon of hilarity. The 2000s saw the rise of a Greek goddess among men, a funny woman stashing Emmys under her cardigan as a recycler might pluck soda cans from the street. Tina Fey is a comedy master, advancing the art of feminine self-deprecation further than any uterus-carrying comedian before her. Here we see her as her alter-ego, Liz Lemon, on NBC’s 30 Rock.

Fey has been a game-changer for woman comedy writers. Sure, there’s always been the wit of Dorothy Parker, the perkiness of Mary Tyler Moore, the pratfalls of Carol Burnett, all worthy foremothers of comedy.

But Fey has realized the dream of many an awkward teen who had to grow into her mouth. She’s taken her sense of humor and parlayed it into a celebrated career spanning the earliest Baby Boomer to the fledgling Millennial. With her great success as the creator of 30 Rock to her best-selling memoir, Bossypants, she reminds us all that it’s okay to be funny based on a shared love of twee-desserts. Or a painful childhood spent sobbing in an appropriately-sized colonial lady outfit.

But what does Fey think about a world in comedy where invitations to soft-porn mansions are peddled about as easily as studio drive-ons? She has made an art of not leading with her looks, but is quick to avoid criticism of women who are perceived to do such that.

As she told NPR, “It’s just such a tangled-up issue, the way women present themselves – whether or not they choose to put their thumbs in their panties on the cover of Maxim and judge each other back and forth on it. It’s a complicated issue, and we didn’t go much further on saying anything other than to say, ‘Yeah, it’s a complicated issue and we’re all kind of figuring it out as we go.’”

She went on to speak about Olivia Munn, actress and “Daily Show” correspondent, who is criticized for exactly being “too pretty for the room.” As Fey spoke of Munn, “because she’s very beautiful, people are like, ‘You’re using that.’ It’s a mess. We can’t figure it out.’”

While Fey professes to lack any real answers to solve the comedy conundrum for female writers, she still leads by example. By making herself the butt of the joke, unafraid of being perceived as ugly, fat, or anything-but-comfortable in a food-stained cardigan, she’s taking comedy beyond the beauty borders for women. She’s brought first-world female foibles into the spotlight and reminded us that it’s okay to laugh at ourselves.

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Column“Do you know where you’re going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you?” – Diana Ross

After four luxuriously stupid days off – an epoch for an editor, really – wherein I spent much time, energy and money hurling myself down snowy mountainsides doing what other people call “Tahoe” and I call “please don’t look at me, no seriously, please go over to that other slope,” and less than zero time doing anything of intellectual merit, summoning the synapses has been something of a hurdle. Use it or lose, the saying goes, and is it ever true. When I found myself actually watching The Last of the Mohicans and meaning it this weekend, I decided to seek help.

I found solace in Rush Limbaugh. Rush, issuer of the hilarious little tirade meant to poke some good old fun, has been losing advertisers left and right. As usual, the liberal media, but now I’m being redundant, is having a field day with a couple silly words that Rush used merely to demonstrate absurdity by being absurd. Or is that illustrate? I can never keep it straight.

After initially refusing to say those two magic words (no, not those words), Rush caved and apologized for his use of the infamous two words (in case you’ve been living under a rock, or perhaps lying unconscious on a ski slope, they were “slut” and “prostitute”), presumably because he could no longer say it with flowers. He did not, however, apologize for the 53 associated insults or the tirade generally, which only made things worse, so then he really had to apologize, for real this time, for all of it, sweetheart, if you’ll just listen to me, I can change, I promise:

“This is the mistake I made – in fighting them on this issue last week I became like them, against my own instincts, against my own knowledge, against everything I know to be right or wrong,” Limbaugh said. “I descended to their level when I used those two words to attack Sandra Fluke. That was my error and I became like them. And I feel very badly about that. I always try to maintain a very high degree of integrity and independence on this program.”

“What has your cult done for you lately?” Tina admonished me from the pages of Bossypants, after describing how devoting her life to the cult of comedy has resulted in such things as a loving husband, fame, fortune, and creative fulfillment.

It’s a good question. What has your cult done for you, lately? For Limbaugh’s Dittoheads, the withered fruits are a conservative cornucopia: Stubborn irrelevance, delusional insecurity, and so much more! Nuclear marriage to a mean streak. The delightfully jarring pitter patter of screaming slurs. Fear in the garage, desperation in every pot.

Something tells me Tina’s no Dittohead, unless I missed that 30 Rock, but her question is the best one I’ve heard since before I didn’t have snow between my ears because it applies equally to everyone. “What has your cult done for you lately?”

We all have a cult (or two, or even three, if we’re extra slutty), be it politics, sex, sexual politics, food, health, religion, tech, work, fashion.

Green.

And while it’s always easy to point fingers at the colicky cult that is the Grand Old Party, we should also look at our own. Because what has the green cult done for us, lately?

This is the latest installment in your editor’s column, The Insider’s Guide to Life.

Image: Daveybot

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Women are expressing themselves online with flair and without reservation. Duh.

More and more women are making themselves heard. The web has opened the door for more women to use their voices, and we’re not just talking about blogHers. They are journalists, bloggers, comedians, sisters, mothers, wives, and friends. They are writing about their bodies, their relationships, their marriages, their children, our culture – without reservations.

What the women we admire here share in common is a strong personality, a unique voice, a way of seeing the world and a gift for storytelling that is accessible and, most importantly, humorous. Because it’s a fact: Women are actually pretty hilarious. Bravo to the following XX-ers for their bravery when tackling difficult topics, and their refusal to be nice girls in the face of criticism.

Molly Ivins

Molly Ivins was an outspoken liberal who wrote about politics in a brazen, bald-faced manner. Based in Texas, she took aim at the politics and politicians in her state, and, in the last years of her life, targeted President George W. Bush. She worked a stint at The New York Times, where she would come to work in blue jeans accompanied by her dog whose name was an expletive, and continually challenged her editors in word use and language. She returned to Texas to write for the Dallas Times Herald when they promised to let her write whatever she wanted.

She famously wrote about one congressman: “If his I.Q. slips any lower, we’ll have to water him twice a day.” (h/t NYT) She continued to speak her mind in print until her death in 2007.

“During a recent panel on the numerous failures of American journalism, I proposed that almost all stories about government should begin: “Look out! They’re about to smack you around again!”

Heather Armstrong

An early blogger (we’re talking 20o1), Armstrong is best known for writing snarky comments and funny anecdotes about her coworkers and boss on her blog, Dooce, and then getting fired for it. Now, “dooced” is a term in the Urban Dictionary defined as “to lose your job due to the contents of your weblog.” Armstrong’s blog is now one of the most-read mommy blogs on the internet, although it started out as a personal blog about her work as a graphic designer in Los Angeles and her dating life. Her book, It Sucked and Then I Cried, How I had a Baby, a Breakdown and Much Needed Margarita details her battle with post-partum depression. She is warm, uncensored, and talks frankly about her blogging life, her entitled dogs, her growing daughters and everything in between.

“…Leta scrunched up her face and moaned, ‘Something isn’t right.’ It smelled like someone had died. Someone who hadn’t showered in the 20 years leading up to his death. Someone who ate only sauerkraut and licorice. And wore Crocs.

When we reached the family room we saw a giant puddle of vomit in the middle of our Persian rug, so huge that it was leaking off onto the hardwood floor and creating other puddles. MULTIPLYING DOG VOMIT. That shit is scientific. … There was no way around it. We were scooping up dog vomit with our hands and trying not to puke. Enter: our little helper.

… For those of you who have never lived with a two-year-old, they don’t help anything. Give them a broom and you will have to replace broken light fixtures. Marlo wanted to jump head first into that vomit. ‘Help you!’ she said.

… That’s when Jon picked her up and moved her backwards, setting her down with enough oomph to reinforce the severity of multiplying dog vomit. …Except, she didn’t understand. She just wanted to help. And so she collapsed into hysterical tears. And these were not the tears of a toddler who did not get her way. They were tears of a toddler whose feelings had been crushed. Decimated. A mother knows the difference.

I felt as shitty as the mountain of diarrhea we discovered a half hour later in the living room, worse than the other puddle of vomit we found on the carpet in the study. … I apologized to Marlo and let her use a few paper towels to wipe up the more shallow parts of the mess. Although, sometimes you have to draw a line and that line is ‘toddler is not allowed anywhere near canine diarrhea.’ Except I dug down deep to find the patience to say gently, ‘Sorry, Marlo. Only mom and dad get to clean up the poop.’”

Tina Fey

We recently discussed Fey’s hilarious book, Bossypants. As an established comedian, you expect her to be funny, but she is also down-to-earth and she delivers her stories in such an appealingly dry way you’re surprised to find yourself laughing. Fey sneaks up on you.

As a college student, Tina exacted revenge on a girl who had previously stolen her boyfriend. Afterward, she writes, “Obviously, as an adult I realize this girl-on-girl sabotage is the third worst kind of female behavior, right behind saying ‘like’ all the time and leaving your baby in a dumpster. I’m proud to say I would never sabotage a fellow female like that now. Not even if Christina Applegate and I were both up for the same part as Vince Vaughn’s mother in a big-budget comedy called Beer Guys.”

Denene Millner

Millner is a columnist for Parenting magazine and has authored several books. She began her blog, My Brown Baby, in September 2008, as “a space I created for African American moms looking to lend their critical but all-too-often ignored voices to the national parenting debate.” On My Brown Baby, Millner weighs in on inappropriate fashions for girls, the critical role of fathers, teaching children about race, the beauty of black girls and politics. Her voice is rich, clear and unequivocal. The way she describes her daughters’ beauty is lyrical and full of emotion, while her comments about politics are laser-sharp.

“…this Michele Bachmann character has the temperament of a nagging Chihuahua: She just refuses to go quietly into the dark night.
So since she insists on standing in front of microphones and saying the first thing to come to her small, small mind as she marathons on the road to the White House, responsible Americans have the duty to step up and shine a light on the crazy. After all, this is the country that elected Jesse Ventura, Arnold Schwarzenegger – hell, Ronald Reagan and the political wreck that was George W. Bush. We don’t exactly have the best track record with putting and keeping zany candidates in their place. I’d really like to make Bachmann an exception to the ‘We’re America and We Love To Elect the Crazy’ rule in the next presidential election.”

Julie Klausner

In her book, I Don’t Care About Your Band: What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated, Klausner is so truthful and unsparing, that she made Vanity Fair’s Mike Sacks blush. Klausner also wrote a weekly business advice column for Salon called Lady Business. A journalist and comedian giving business advice. It works.

When a male employee wrote in about being distracted by his coworker’s low-cut blouses, Klausner wrote,

“What I know is definitely uncool is for you, a young, straight man in the workplace – not a minority unless it is Opposite Day – to take umbrage with a female colleague’s apparel choices. Because, frankly, what Perla in accounting wears to work so she can cover her bits and feed her family is really none of your business – even if your erection disagrees. If she’s violating a dress code rule that she’d been briefed on at the time of her hire, somebody in H.R. will talk to her, and she’ll probably be embarrassed and start wearing a scarf. Wow, what a victory: treat yourself to an extra Michelob Ultra if and when that goes down. As for your not being able to ‘focus’ on your work? It’s, no offense, so down on the list of problems I’m worried about that the oil-coated ducks in the Gulf are taking their last gasps of breath just to call you a chode.”

Mindy Kaling

Some call Kaling, a writer and actress on The Office, the Tina Fey for the younger generation. In Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? her voice does have a young, fresh quality to it. When she talks about never having had a one-night stand and how she reacts to her friends’ stories, you can’t help but be charmed by her practicality and reasoning. Her best friend rules bring back memories of high school, her heartache over middle-aged valets is endearing, and her distaste for people using the word “retarded” reinforces the good feeling you get from her stories.

“Teenage girls, please don’t worry about being super popular in high school, or being the best actress in high school, or the best athlete. Not only do people not care about any of that the second you graduate, but when you get older, if you reference your successes in high school too much, it actually makes you look kind of pitiful, like some babbling old Tennessee Williams character with nothing going on in their current life. What I’ve noticed is that no one who was a big star in high school is also a big star later in life, except athletes. For us overlooked kids, it’s so wonderfully fair.”

images: EssG, trialx, carol browne, david shankbone, thebrownbookshelf, newyork.ucbtheatre, nohodamon

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Tina Fey’s memoir is funny and sage.

Tina Fey’s memoir, Bossypants, grabbed me from the minute she entered kindergarten and had her first encounter with a little boy she just met. She held up her carefully finished drawing for him to admire, and he promptly grabbed it and ripped it in half. She was speechless as a little girl, but as an adult, she clarified her thoughts at the time as, “Oh, it’s like that, motherfucker? Got it.”

That reaction says a lot. It sets the stage for her future interactions with both men and women in the workplace, which is a compelling element of the book. As she worked her way up in a very tough business, she saw other people, and herself, through an unvarnished lens. She doesn’t sugarcoat anything to make herself look better, so you feel that her narratives and assessments of other people are just as honest.

Fey has been lauded as a role model for aspiring writers, comedians, and mothers balancing careers and families, and she is clearly that, but she is also a strong leader. “Ever since I became an executive producer of 30 Rock, people have asked me, ‘Is is hard for you being the boss?’…You know, in that same way they say, ‘Gosh Mr. Trump, is it awkward for you to be the boss of all these people?’ I can’t answer for Mr. Trump, but in my case, it is not.”

Fey’s story also reveals how improvisation helped her to learn how to work with people. Comedy can teach a person a lot about finding success.

For example, the first rule of improvisation is to agree. “Always agree and SAY YES.” When working with a partner and that person says something, you need to agree with their premise and move it forward to advance the scene. Disagreement grinds everything to a halt.

“Now obviously in real life you’re not always going to agree with everything everyone says. But the Rule of Agreement reminds you to ‘respect what your partner has created’ and to at least start from an open-minded place. Start with a YES and see where that takes you. As an improviser, I always find it jarring when I meet someone in real life whose first answer is no.”

The second rule is not only to say yes, but YES, AND… Agree, and add something of your own. “To me, YES, AND means don’t be afraid to contribute. It’s your responsibility to contribute. Always make sure you’re adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile.”

Make statements. “Whatever the problem, be a part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles. We’ve all worked with that person. That person is a drag.”

Lately there has been a trend where women and men both accuse women and girls of speaking in apologetic questions and Fey points it out as well. “No one wants to go to a doctor who says, ‘I’m going to be your surgeon? I’m here to talk to you about your procedure?…Make statements with your actions and your voice.”

The last rule? “THERE ARE NO MISTAKES, only opportunities. If I start a scene as what I think is very clearly a cop riding a bicycle, but you think I am a hamster in a hamster wheel, guess what? Now I’m a hamster in a hamster wheel. I’m not going to stop everything to explain that it was really supposed to be a bike…In improv there are no mistakes, only beautiful, happy accidents.”

As she was rising to the top of a then-man’s world of comedy, she saw the balance shift from male-dominated companies at Second City to gender-equal scenes. She wrote about how one director justified cutting a scene by saying, “The audience doesn’t want to see a scene between two women.” At the suggestion that the companies be gender-equal, there was initial panic that there would not be enough parts for the extra women.

“This made no sense to me, probably because I speak English and have never had a head injury. We weren’t doing Death of a Salesman. We were making up the show ourselves. How could there not be enough parts? Where was the ‘Yes, and’? If everyone had something to contribute, there would be enough. The insulting implication, of course, was that the women wouldn’t have any ideas.”

Fey saw many changes at Second City and, later, Saturday Night Live. Women contributed and Fey became one of the head writers. One of the most memorable skits during the 2008 election was between Fey and Amy Poehler, playing Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton.

“This is what I tell young women who ask me for career advice. People are going to try to trick you. To make you feel that you are in competition with one another. ‘You’re up for a promotion. If they go with a woman, it’ll be between you and Barbara.’ Don’t be fooled. You’re not in competition with other women. You’re in competition with everyone. Also, I encourage them to always wear a bra. Even if you don’t think you’ll need it, just…you know what? You’re never going to regret it.”

Image: Gage Skidmore

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A weekly roundup of EcoSalon’s top stories.

Places & Spaces: Canvas Hotel is a visual vacation, never mind a cyclist’s dream hideaway. Based in Southern Norway, the adventure starts the moment you arrive.

Lady Gaga on EcoSalon? In Shade Grown Hollywood: The Conscious Mind Of Lady Gaga, writer Kathie Butler says “Lady Gaga is on the way to becoming an icon of post-feminist sexuality. But is she a confident cultural attaché to our own fantastical fantasies? Or she is more of a mouthpiece of modern times, a voice raging against homophobia and discrimination?” We explore Lady Gaga, aka Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta’s level of consciousness.

With Japan still reeling in the wake of an 8.9 magnitude earthquake that sent a 30-foot wall of ocean water onto the Fukushima-Daiichi plant on the coast of Japan, we find ourselves asking if there are more viable options than nuclear as we watch radiation leaking from core reactors. In The Nuclear Option, writer Stephanie Rogers reviews the pros and cons.

In her weekly Green Plate, writer Vanessa Barrington’s column Is Urban Farming The Next Green Cottage Industry? asks if urban farming is a viable career for our younger generation and a dependable source of food for city dwellers.

This week, our editor’s column The Insider’s Guide To Life: Bite Me dives into female bullying, giving important tools to empower one to bite back. Ost writes: “Who on earth are these people? Tina Fey called them Mean Girls, and they are everywhere, no matter how grown up we get. Naively, I had approached my very first bully with the plucky optimism of a community fundraiser. Soon, she needed me and my reliable niceness, and when you get to that point it’s a short trip to toast. I was but the earnest wheat germ, she, the flaring toaster.”

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