New Age in the new age.

Event: Liveblogging Maidon’s first sexual encounter. October 22nd, 9:30 EST.

Your response: Maybe attending.

Hi everyone! Just wanted to send out a quick reminder to all of you “maybes” out there that this weekend is the big day and how much it would mean to Maidon if you could share in this family moment with us. I know how busy all of you are! However, those of you who were lucky enough to co-experience Maidon’s natural home birth with us certainly won’t want to miss out on her entrance into reproductive maturity. Circle of life!

A lot of people have been asking us why we chose to live blog and simulcast (via Skype for all you international attendees! I’m looking at you, Aunt Denise!) Maidon’s first intimate encounter rather than just releasing the traditional Twitter announcement or flock of white doves. Well, on one of the most recent Monday night drum circles, Ken challenged everyone in the family to pioneer ways to improve our SEO practices and drive traffic in the coming year. Someone certainly earned the Medicine Wheel of Facilitated Expression that week!

Those of you who attended Parrish’s first birthday party/anti-circumcision demonstration a few years ago will remember how precious these live-streamed shared experiences can be (not to mention the keepsake crocheted foreskin cozies). Who could forget last year’s ultra-marathon to beat menopause we launched on Kickstarter? Or Ken’s vasectomy gluten-free bake sale? These are treasured moments in our family history that are all the richer for being available online in incredible detail for anyone to see, whether friend, relative, neighbor, colleague or spambot. That’s why we add the name of every unique visitor to our blog on the Bailey family quilt. We couldn’t do this without you, MarinDad47.

Afterwards there will be a small ceremony as we share the remaining freeze-dried strips of placenta jerky that Migda, our family doula, prepared after Maidon expressed her autonomy in transitioning “out” of my uterus. Please feel free to stay as we compost the remnants of Maidon’s hymen and use it to sustain the seedlings in her Garden of Self-Nourishing Womanhood, formerly Ken’s heritage chard plot. Commemorative photos and homemade quince jelly will be available for those of you with placental allergies.

Blessings to you all, and don’t forget to tweet, retweet, stumble, digg, star, review on Yelp, like, tumble, post, repost, check in, share, upmod and upvote!

Image: webtreats

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We’ve all got one – a little tube in the nightstand drawer, ready for those moments when our bodies seem to be failing at what they’re supposed to do naturally. At the risk of sounding like a commercial, I’m just going to say it: vaginal dryness happens.

Maybe you’re on birth control pills, or maybe your man isn’t spending enough – ahem – quality time before the act itself takes place. But if you find yourself reaching for lubrication, stop and read those ingredients! You might be filling one of the most delicate parts of your body with a bunch of scary chemicals, and even affecting your fertility.

It’s all too easy to just grab whatever the most promising-looking plastic tube on the drugstore shelf. The labels on products like KY Jelly, Astroglide and Durex Play focus on adjectives like “sensual” and “warming”, not safety – and sometimes, ingredients aren’t even disclosed.

Here’s the thing about most conventional sex lubes:

Many contain parabens. KY brand lubricants – aside from the ‘sensitive’ version – contain parabens, a class of chemicals used as preservatives. Even the relatively natural-sounding brand ‘Phyto Soya’ is packed with practically every paraben in existence. Parabens are estrogen mimickers and have been linked to breast cancer. Chemicals like parabens are easily absorbed through the skin, and mucous membranes – like vaginal tissue – are even more susceptible.

They’re often petroleum-based. Any lubricant that lists mineral oil in its ingredient list is made from petrochemicals. An obvious offender is plain old petroleum jelly. If you like putting fossil fuels in your vagina, raise your hand! Yeah, that’s what I thought.

They can cause infection. Whenever you see glycerin or a word starting with “glycol” in the ingredients, you’ve got potential problems. These ingredients – common in lubes like Astroglide – are closely related to glucose, which means they’re a sugary feast for yeast. Not exactly sexy.

They affect fertility. If you’re trying to conceive, think twice about using any old lube. Studies show that lubricants like KY, Astroglide and FemGlide affect both sperm quality and motility, meaning they slow ’em down and damage their DNA. While a product called “Pre-Seed” proved to be the most sperm-friendly, it does contain parabens, so it’s best not to use artificial lube at all if possible.

That doesn’t mean that just because you’re breastfeeding, going through menopause or taking antidepressants, you have to resign yourself to uncomfortable sex. Check out some of these alternatives:

Firefly Organics – Though not made for use with latex condoms (polyurethane is okay), Firefly Organics is a 100 percent natural, paraben-free personal lubricant made with sunflower seed extract, cocoa butter and shea butter.

Yes Lubricant – Yes brand lubricants come in both water- and oil-based varieties for latex condom compatibility. The oil-based product contains shea butter, sweet almond oil, sunflower oil, beeswax, cocoa butter and vitamin E while the water-based product is made with aloe, guar gum, locust bean gum and flax extract.

Good Clean Love – Totally natural, organic and vegan, Good Clean Love lubricants come in naturally scented versions like lavender rose, almost naked with a touch of lemon and vanilla, and cinnamon vanilla – a spicy scent reminiscent of pumpkin pie, a scent that most men find sexy.

Coconut Oil – Some ladies swear by plain old virgin organic coconut oil as a sex lube, and though no studies have been done on its safety, it seems like a great choice. Coconut oil is naturally fungicidal, so nothing funky will grow in it (which is a common problem in any kind of lube). It’s also antibacterial and silky smooth, but avoiding it in conjunction with latex condoms is probably a good idea.

Image: Zawezome

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Some people might consider me to be pretty hardcore green. I mean, I’m about to give up many of my possessions and move into a tiny house. I make my own cleaning products and go to great lengths to avoid products with excess packaging. But you will never, ever hear me utter the word “˜ecosexual.’

Don’t get me wrong – green sex is great. And I consider myself pretty committed to the well being of the planet. But something about the term makes me cringe, whether it’s used in the broad sense – identifying yourself as a greenie – or in the narrower sense, having to do with your bedroom habits.

The term “˜ecosexual’ was coined a few years ago, but has cropped up in the news lately with the publishing of a new book called Eco-Sex: Go Green Between the Sheets and Make Your Love Life Sustainable, by Stefanie Iris Weiss.

“An environmentally-minded person can say, “˜I’m an ecosexual’ to broadly define their commitment to saving the planet. “˜Environmentalist’ and “˜green’ are nice, but why not make it sexier?” Weiss told the Examiner.

Sure, green is hip. Green is sexy. Be proud. But in declaring yourself to be an ecosexual, it sounds like you’re broadcasting to the world that being green is so beyond the norm, it requires its own vague sexual orientation.

As a term for sustainability between the sheets, it totally works. We are, in fact, in the midst of an ecosexual revolution involving everything from phthalate-free sex toys to considering the environmental implications of unplanned pregnancy, as Weiss covers in her book. And hey, if you’re neck-deep in the world of dating, putting yourself out there with so bold a label could indeed help you find a suitable mate.

But personally, I hope it doesn’t catch on in a bigger way. It’s hard enough getting the general public to realize we’re not all fanatics who cry at the sight of a tree being cut down.

What do you think? Would you introduce yourself as an ecosexual?

Image: Big Al

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