Clean energy at its dirtiest: Pornhub’s “Wankband” produces green power by putting chronic masturbators to good use.

Because when I think Pornhub, I think staunch environmentalists: Better known as the Fitbit’s creepy uncle, the “Wankband” is a (hopefully waterproof) device that allows you to save the planet and charge your smartphone by—you guessed it—masturbating. Finally, moms across the country can make their teenage sons useful (in fact, there were a few in my day who would have been able to feed energy back into the grid).

“It’s well known how incredibly fast we run out of our natural resources and, what’s worse, how much they pollute in order to create energy,” says Pornhub’s promo video. “At Pornhub, we realize that by offering our users millions of hours of adult content, we are part of the problem. That’s why we’re going to show men how they can save the planet while doing what they do best.” (And the Nobel Prize goes to…)

The device contains a valve with a small weight inside, and the upwards-downwards motion of masturbating causes the weight to move up and down as well, which generates energy you can store for a rainy day. There’s a USB port on the side of the “Wankband,” so you can plug your tech devices into it and charge them using the power stored.

“Turn your jobless roommate into a productive person,” the clip says. “And now, when your partner catches you in the act, you can simply say that you’re trying to save on the electric bill. The possibilities are endless.” Nope, there’s only one: Divorce papers.

It says the device is unisex and will work for women just as well as men, but they’re not really clear on how that’s possible, since the motion that charges it is more dude-friendly. If you start seeing a bunch of women around your neighborhood with sprained wrists, I guess that answers our question. Of course, as Pornhub so eloquently puts it, you can “do your part with your part” by signing up to be one of their be(a)ta testers (ha). You know, for science.

Is the “Wankband” a realistic way to produce clean energy? Of course not. If it’s anything like those flashlights you have to shake for an hour to get a few minutes of light, I’m not so sure guys will end up with a charged phone so much as a really large bicep… and possibly carpal tunnel.

And I’m sure this has nothing to do with the fact that in order for men to put the “Wankband” to good use, they’d have to watch more porn. Nah, because that would be ridiculous.

I will say though, the brand’s humblebrag video is good for a giggle:

What do you think of this er, interesting way to produce clean energy?

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The post Produce Clean Energy with Pornhub’s ‘Wankband’ by Getting Dirty appeared first on EcoSalon.

Mayor, mayor, on the wall: Who is the greenest of them all?

My neighboring hometown across the Bay, San Francisco, makes all the greenest cities lists, with its mayor, Gavin Newsom, regularly billed as “America’s Greenest Mayor.” But behind the glossy Priuses, how green is SF?

Google “country’s greenest mayor” and you get some interesting results. Rocky Anderson, former mayor of Salt Lake City, comes up first. Greg Nickels, former mayor of Seattle, also gets some hits. Then there’s Chicago’s Richard Daly, New York’s Bloomberg, Shirley Franklin of Atlanta, and Bill White of Houston, along with Gavin and others mentioned in this article. L.A.’s chief executive, Villaraigosa, just loses out to Newsom in this article about the two mayors’ dueling plans to cut greenhouse gases.

San Francisco definitely stacks up among the greenest of the green and deservedly so, but is San Francisco all about the shiny green PR-driven gestures, neglecting the concrete hard daily work that nobody notices? Let’s find out.

What San Francisco Does Right

1. Curbside recycling and composting

San Francisco was one of the first (if not the first) large cities to institute curbside composting and recycling. As of late last year, San Francisco made composting mandatory for houses, apartment buildings, businesses and restaurants.

2. Plastic Bag Ban

San Francisco was the first American city to ban plastic bags.

3. Green Building

San Francisco has some of the strictest green building codes in the nation.

Mayor Newsom clearly enjoys being the first to do anything, but what about the everyday, not-so-flashy actions he could take to green the city and set an example for its citizens?

If I were mayor for a year, here are five things I’d do.

1. Spread the composting bug to the airport.

If they can do it in El Salvador, they can certainly do it in San Francisco. The above picture is one I took  about a year ago in El Salvador, yet on that same trip, in the San Francisco International Airport, I couldn’t find a place to recycle my water bottle (I  know, I know) or compost my apple core. A green airport is a great way to show the world that San Francisco walks its talk.

2. Leave the SUV in the garage and ride that bike once in awhile.

Ok, so the mayor’s ride is a hybrid, but a $58,000 SUV paid for with tax dollars and driven to Montana by a staffer while the mayor took a private jet? Come on. When he was mayor, Rocky Anderson’s personal car was a compressed natural gas Honda. The plan to revitalize Market Street and make it more bicycle and pedestrian-friendly is a good one but is only happening now after years of lobbying by bicycle and pedestrian groups. The Mayor could lead on this.

3. Want to leave the SUV in the garage and rub shoulders with a few strangers on Muni? Get ready for a mess.

Fare hikes, service cuts and allegations of misplaced public funds have riders fuming. The mayor should see what it feels like to be packed onto the N Judah at rush hour. Or have his local bus line cut out completely.

4. Support Clean Public Power.

One of the city’s oldest and most heavily polluting power plants, The Potrero Power Plant needs to be shut down. It is scheduled for closure, but unfortunately, the city wants to replace it with another polluting fossil fuel burning plant. Also, the fight for public power is heating up again in San Francisco. Advocates say public power would open the way for more green technologies. The mayor doesn’t necessarily agree and PG&E is shelling out gigantic, steaming piles of money to put a measure on ballot seeking to require 2/3 majority to pass public power.

5. Speaking of gigantic, steaming piles, stop selling toxic sludge – we know it’s not good for us. That high-quality, nutrient rich “compost” you’re giving away to gardeners? No thanks. It’s just the toxic sludge industry’s way of gaining public acceptance.

How does your city stack up? Is it all bells and whistles, or is it like Portland, with a unified green front at all levels?

Images: Dave Minogue, Vanessa Barrington

The post Dear San Francisco: 5 Ways You Can Go Green appeared first on EcoSalon.

Everyone knows that onions can produce tears. But do you know that they can also produce energy? That’s the word from Steve Gill of Gill Onions, who has been using onion waste to run the refrigerators and lights at his family’s processing plant in Oxnard, California.

Prior to converting onions to energy, the company either spread the onion waste as fertilizer over their fields throughout California or sold it as cattle feed. Both these options posed a hazard not only to the atmosphere but also the groundwater.

These days at Gills Onions, the fermented onion juice is converted to methane and burned in the two on-site fuels cells, saving the company around $1.4 million in electricity and disposal costs.

And this is only the beginning of Gill Onion’s sustainability aspirations. Their aim is to turn the plant into a zero-waste facility through actions such as recycling employees’ lunch leftovers and revamping packaging.

Image: Darwin Bell

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