While they may not say so, most people visit Hawaii in order to heal. Different words might be used: “relax,” or “escape.” They’re all synonymous, though, with the fundamental idea of healing. It only seems fitting that the islands are home to ho’oponopono, an ancient ritual of forgiveness and conflict resolution.

Hawaii may very well be my favorite place in the world: A lofty statement, especially from a New Yorker. I’m always seeking an excuse to visit, and when I do, I often go alone. It seems a perfect fit for the solo traveler: Safe, beautiful, quiet when I want it to be, and, if I just need a damn mai tai, there’s never one too far away. But my connection to Hawaii is more profound than cocktails garnished with plumerias. It’s a spiritual, restorative sensation that I experience only when I visit there, and the reason why, when I’m at my emotionally weakest points, I try to educate myself about Hawaiian approaches to mental health. Ho’oponopono is one of them.

I first began reading about ho’oponopono shortly after I graduated from business school, when I picked up Ulrich E. Duprée’s short, lightweight “Ho’oponopono: The Hawaiian Forgiveness Ritual as the Key to Your Life’s Fulfillment.” In the book, Duprée defines ho’oponopono as “love in action.”

“You forgive yourself and others for having inflicted any sort of hurt,” he writes, “or for having failed to help when needed.” It carries a mantra of, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.”

Forgiveness, for many of us, is a rather tall order. There’s an observable tendency in American culture to lean toward blame, whether asking, “Where did I go wrong?” of ourselves, or, “What the hell is the matter with you?” of others. We are not a society to whom grace and compassion come easily. We body-shame. We yell. We’re always in a hurry. No wonder Hawaii is an escapist’s dream.

One of the most common situational instances of fault and blame’s prevalence can be found during a breakup. Often, a relationship’s end is rife with anger, bitterness and resentment; forgiveness is, much of the time, the last thing felt by either party. I should know; I’ve been through enough failed relationships to be an expert. (See what I did there? “Failed.” No self-forgiveness here!) In fact, during my most recent visit to Hawaii, another solo trip for which my original purpose was to write about farmers markets, I experienced what is likely my most difficult breakup thus far. Here’s the weird part: In this particular situation, there was no anger. There was no blame, or bitterness, or resentment. There was only pain, and a lot of it. I wasn’t sure if even Hawaii could heal me.

Somewhere along the way, I realized that, despite my excitement around my travels to the beautiful island, I had largely lost my regard for ho’oponopono. There I was, in the ritual’s birthplace, and I hadn’t even thought to further educate myself about it, or truly put it into practice. My pain became an opportunity. After all, in his book, Duprée notes, “Ho’oponopono is a spiritual-soul method of purification that cleanses us from fears and worries, destructive relationship patterns, and any religious dogmas and paradigms that oppose our personal and spiritual development. It cleans out the blockages in our thoughts and cell structure, for our thoughts are made manifest in our body.” That was it! Even though I hadn’t expected to spend my time in Hawaii on the breakup process, the island was already working on the healing process before I even got there, by clearing my mind enough to acknowledge the truth about a relationship that simply was no longer working.

In the introduction of his ho’oponopono book (which, yes, I highly recommend everyone pick up), Duprée explains the role of Hawaiian kahunas as “guardians of this ancient teaching,” noting that “to know something without then using it really makes nonsense of it, because wisdom is revealed by what a person does, not by what they know.” Meditation is, ultimately, a practice. Perhaps putting forgiveness into practice is the revelation of such wisdom: To others, but just as critically, to ourselves. Viewing pain as an opportunity is a powerful phenomenon: One that allows us to operate with something other than a sense of our weakness and suffering.

It’s as if Hawaii says to us, “Hey! Look around you! It’s pretty beautiful, isn’t it? Sit down, and let it heal you.” Of course, not everyone can physically visit Hawaii when such crises occur, and we never know when one will hit.  That doesn’t mean we can’t rely on the lessons of ho’oponopono, or learn that its regular practice benefits us in a broader sense, and not just when we are in trouble.  If we realize how important it is to forgive, both ourselves and others, and how self-destructive it is to constantly seek blame when things go wrong, each day of our lives can be richer.

Say hey to Amanda on Twitter or Instagram

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Image: Girl playing the swing on beach on Shutterstock

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The moment you feel a cold coming on, use the wisdom of a thousand grandmothers from around the world and make one of these healing homemade chicken soup recipes to feel better almost instantly.

There’s something so comforting about the silkiness of fresh homemade chicken soup. The velvety broth, soft vegetables and tender chicken are almost instantly healing. Different cultures have different versions of chicken soup but the basics are the same: boil parts of a raw chicken for a few hours and add vegetables and either rice or noodles.

2. Korean Ginseng Soup
Samgyetang in Korean, this delicious soup packs a healthy amount of ginseng which is prized for its medicinal benefits in many asian cultures. Ginseng is commonly used for energy and immunity boosting and this soup is an excellent way to get your fill without taking unpleasant pills.

Photo by Ally-Jane 

3. Jewish Matzo Ball Soup

Jewish grandmothers have followed the wisdom of the philosopher Maimonides since the 12th century, who wrote of the healing powers of chicken soup. Matzoh balls are delicious fluffy balls of crushed matzo meal and egg.

4. Moroccan Chicken Soup

This wonderfully filling soup is spicy from the added garam masala as well hearty from the moroccan cous cous. Fresh avocado adds protein and flavor.

Photo by Alpha

5. Japanese Miso Noodle Soup
The rich smoky flavor of miso is mixed here with chicken, noodles and shiitake mushrooms for a divine soup that will lift your spirits in no time. This dish is elegant enough to serve guests so you can relax and concentrate on feeling better.

6. Colombian Chicken Stew
This latin stew is brilliantly flavored with dried oregano, fresh corn and cilantro. Capers add a delicate saltiness and avocado balances everything out.

7. French Pot-Au-Feu  
This gastronomic classic relies on the beautiful vegetables of the French countryside for a bright and vitamin-rich stew. Luckily, potatoes, cabbage and squash are available almost everywhere so there’s no need to visit the French countryside, just your local Farmer’s market.

Related on Eco Salon 

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Chicken soup image (top) via Shutterstock

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Here’s a lesson in how to forgive.

A few months ago I was on the beach with some friends, one of which starting talking about a woman whom I had known in college. She had formerly been a friend who had been so cruel to me I nearly transferred schools. In the midst of the discussion, I realized that the same anger that bubbled up a decade ago was still present. Resentment was like poison flowing through my veins. I needed to forgive her.

We all have the people in our lives that wrong us. In fact, entire societies are wronged on a global level. Recently, I was watching a news show that told the story of a woman who had forgiven the man that murdered her husband in the midst of ethnic genocide in Darfur. She didn’t do it for him, she did it so she could let go of the resentment and her community could begin to move on from the devastation. She knew how to forgive.

Refusing to forgive someone can become the defining feature of your life and it can hinder healthy relationships because you think that everyone is going to wrong you like the person who wronged you in the past.

One of the best ways to let go of resentment is through mindfulness meditation, specifically a form of meditation called loving kindness meditation. The meditation walks you through different people that you need to develop loving kindness towards:

• a respected, beloved person – such as a spiritual teacher;
• 
a dearly beloved – which could be a close family member or friend;
• 
a neutral person – somebody you know, but have no special feelings towards, e.g.: a person who serves you in a shop;
• 
a hostile person – someone you are currently having difficulty with.

The key is acceptance of the person that you’re having difficulty with at the time. Jack Kornfield offers a great loving kindness meditation as part of his beginner meditation audio session.

In the final stage, begin to pray for that person that wronged you. Forgiveness heals and it’s the only way to get over the pain that someone has caused you in life. Learn how to forgive.

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ― Steve Maraboli

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Image: coloredgrey

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The surge of Western interest in the potent South American psychedelic brew called ayahuasca is bringing great healing and controversy.

The healing path is an onerous one. Whether fighting off or recovering from a physical illness, or working through mental or emotional issues, healing is most often a long process, and a heavy one at that. For some, it can lead back to religion, or the guidance of spiritual teachers. Some may seek solace in yoga or meditation practices, art, hobbies, or traditional therapies, while others seek the help of a different kind: the South American jungle medicine called ayahuasca.

It’s difficult to describe the powerful encounter ayahuasca delivers, even to those who have experience with other psychedelics more common in the U.S. such as mushrooms or LSD. Ayahuasca contains DMT (N,N-Dimethyltryptamine) and is considered the most potent hallucinogenic on the planet. But it’s more than that; it’s described often as “Grandmother”—as in a spirit who becomes present within you, guiding you through brutally raw self-reflection and healing. It is not a party drug, nor is it therapy in any traditional sense. But it is something unforgettable and often life-changing.

In recent years, ayahuasca has become quite popular with Americans, no doubt a result of our disconnected lifestyles, our back-and-forth states of physical and mental health. We oscillate between binging on junk foods, drinking too much alcohol, trading gym night for Game of Thrones. In retribution, we may switch to chugging down shots of wheatgrass, ditching empty calories, and being first in the yoga class queue. But neither of these lifestyles are the ideal; it’s a healthy balance we seek, one where playfulness, and sometimes even reckless behaviors, are brought into alignment with rigidity, discipline and a commitment to doing the right thing for our bodies and spirits. It’s no wonder we also have some of the highest anxiety and depression rates in the world.

Or, perhaps it’s a little bit of our First World boredom that sends us clamoring into buggy jungles in hopes of shamanic encounters and realignments on the ethereal plain. And there’s no question that a trip into the South American rainforest will be life-changing—psychedelic in its own right. But have we romanticized the culture and the medicine into dangerous territory?

A recent Men’s Journal article told the story of a young American seeker who went to Peru to drink ayahuasca after viewing a documentary film on the subject. What happened to Kyle Nolan is every parent’s worst nightmare: The 18-year-old reportedly died after an ayahuasca session and his body buried in the jungle by the shaman. It’s believed Nolan did not receive “pure” ayahuasca, and it was the inclusion of another powerful herb called toé that may have caused his death. And while ayahuasca-related deaths are in fact rare, the cases of faux shamans taking advantage of Westerners are becoming less so. Rapes, molestations, extortion and other behaviors we’d sooner attribute to unstable Americans are now commonplace in ayahuasca tourism regions. Westerners unable to handled the medicine or improperly guided by shamans during the ceremonies have inflicted wounds on themselves, become mentally deranged and even committed suicide in the aftermath of sessions. Should we be shocked?

One of the common (mis)conceptions about tribal cultures is their absolute purity and innocence—a belief that their simpler, shamanic ways of living somehow also equal immunity from greed and negligence. But it’s simply not true. Native Americans, for example, were slaughtering each other long before British settlers arrived and added to the bloodshed. And tribal wars have been common throughout history, all over the planet, including the beloved jungles of the Amazon. Still, we dub these cultures as quaint, which has erroneously come to mean infallible.

Do we travel to the jungles for healing because we must or, simply because we can? While our interest in ayahuasca is certainly an economic boon to low-income communities in countries including Peru, Colombia and Brazil, what do we really know about the long-term impact of the medicine on non-native people? Healing of any kind is a process. And when working with a potent psychedelic, the reverberations of a single session can be felt for months, even years after. It’s not exactly something that can be fully understood overnight. And it’s this desire to understand the experience that can send Westerners back to the jungle repeatedly to try and find the answers.

Granted, great healings do occur under the guidance of legitimate shamans. But they can also happen under less exotic setting, too. It is perhaps our reasons for seeking healing in the first place that will influence the experiences we ultimately receive. That’s not to say innocent people like Kevin Nolan deserve to die, but it can explain why we’re seeing a greater number of incidences like that occur; romantic impulses to venture thousands of miles into harsh environments for something that’s reportedly going to heal us, is not exactly the definition of responsible.

In our efforts to unAmericanize ourselves, we’re, in true American fashion, co-opting something that doesn’t really belong to us. Still, just like eating chocolate or drinking coffee isn’t necessarily a bad thing, despite our losing sight of  their exotic origins, ayahuasca clearly has benefits most of the time. But do we want that relationship to be like the exploitative practices and sugar-laden junk-filled candy the world’s top chocolate makers are known for? Or, can we adopt a Fair Trade, organic approach to shamanic medicine and usher in healthier connections? One thing is certain: no matter what your ultimate goal is, venturing into dark and dangerous jungles is always best approached with extreme caution.

Keep in touch with Jill on Twitter @jillettinger

Image: Howard G. Charing

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Time to pull off the Band-Aids.

Jumping for joy can be counter-intuitive when you’ve been despairing long term. Your cells become expectant of disappointment. The repetition of compromise settles into your muscles and makes reflexes happen. Grey. Less than luminous. Not ideal. In-between half vital and half wanting more. In-between kinda dying and kinda living, a space which can very often be healing, confusing, and wonderfully risky.

Tibetan Buddhists call the place between death and rebirth the Bardo. Catholics have Purgatory. When my Priest explained Purgatory to us in Grade Two, I super-double-dipped-chocolate-vowed to get into heaven, not so much to avoid the flames of hell, but to avoid the total drag of being stuck in between worlds in the Purgatory waiting room of “not quite good enough” losers.

In-between can be terrifically uncomfortable. Like healing, which can be itchy and tight and arduous. And after a while, we can actually manage to get comfortable there, accustomed to the restraints, the warmth of the bandages, tired of how demanding it can be to take good care of ourselves. And so we keep waiting for the fog to lift, naturally. We await the will of heaven. We wait for the meds to kick in. We wait, because, you know, “time heals all things.” (Time, by the way, is not the actual healer. Consciousness is.) And we keep waiting to be healed.

Waiting to be healed can be a tragic form of compromise. When we’re so close to vitality and freedom, we can be lulled by the self-comfort that has served it’s purpose, by the luxury of respites, by the mercy of slow death. Like I said, “in-between” can be risky business. No Buddhist wants to get stuck in the Bardo – they want to come back to life.

The final stages of healing do not necessarily call for organic clearing, but rather, the soul skill of transmutation: intentionally altering your course. Think: wizardry, high-priestess, impassioned agents of change.

TRANSMUTATION, and what my favorite sci-fi movie has to do with getting on with your life…

The Abyss is one of my fave sci-fi movies of the 90’s. A crew of ocean scientists head to new depths of the ocean and it gets rogue and extraterrestrial pretty fast. The scene: Mr. Sexy Sea Captain, “Bud”, played by Ed Harris, and his movie ex-wife, “Lindsey,” played by Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, are trapped in an underwater capsule that’s rapidly filling up with water. It’s dire.

They need to swim back to the mother ship to safety. There’s only one oxygen mask and two of them. The distance is a few meters too far to make it without an air supply. Because Bud is a stronger swimmer, Lindsey decides that she will effectively let herself drown, and then Bud can wear the oxygen mask and swim with her back to the ship to quickly resuscitate her.

I searched high and low to find the complete scene for you online. I really want you to see the part where she is inhaling water and letting her body die, while Bud masks up and prepares to swim her to the ship. It’s deeply moving. It is so metaphorical for the times in your life where you take a deep breath and decide to let it all go – it is the intentional leap into the liminal bardo where we can only trust that we will find life on the other side.

But, I couldn’t find THAT scene (and James Cameron didn’t return my call.) Howevah, what you can view here is the most riveting, moving, nerve-clenching conclusion of that moment where Bud fights for Lindsey’s life.

And THIS is where I get to my point about healing and Transmutation Time:

There comes a time to fight your way out of purgatory. Assess what you learned, bow to your healing process, and tear off the band-aids. Burn things. This is the time to make announcements and head out into the world even if your skin is a bit tender, even if you are limping now.

You bust out of the in-between when you declare that you.have.decided.to.live. No matter what. Such as you are, you are here, and you are ready for more.

Danielle LaPorte is the author of The Fire Starter Sessions: A Soulful + Practical Guide for Creating Success on Your Own Terms (from Random House/Crown). An inspirational speaker, former think tank exec and business strategist, she is the creator of the online program The Spark Kit: A Digital Experience for Entrepreneurs and co-author of Your Big Beautiful Book Plan. Over a million visitors have gone for her straight-up advice on DanielleLaPorte.com, a site that has been deemed “the best place on-line for kick-ass spirituality.”

You can find her on Facebook and on Twitter @daniellelaporte

Image: AlexandraGabriela

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QuoteDaily quotes at EcoSalon.

Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.

– Maya Angelou

image: Theoddnote

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Forever etched in my mind is the painful scene in Marley and Me when the cherished family lab is put to sleep on a vet’s table with his devoted sidekick nestled beside him. I saw the tear jerker with my extended L.A. family during a winter vacation and was moved by the chorus of sobs from siblings and cousins who are raising dogs and horses instead of children.

Sadly, I relived the Marley death scene this week when I put my my 16-year-old glamor puss, Audrey, to sleep.

My family gathered around her on the hospital table, hands on her bony five-pound body as her asparagus green eyes slowly lost focus and she drifted onto her next life. Karma might let her come back as a pug dog that is incessantly bossed around by a Grizabella. Karma might return her as a doomed house fly on a window sill tormented during a hunt. Or better yet, as a new bride loved unconditionally by a cuddly and playful fur ball.

Edwin and I adopted Audrey from the San Francisco SPCA right after getting married, plucking the marbled gray tabby from a box of foster kittens just delivered to the shelter. The moment my husband picked her up and put her close to his ear, she purred like a mad freight train; like no one’s business. “This is a good one,” he proclaimed. And she was, from her early days in a concrete Russian Hill flat to her final years in the grassy suburbs.

Last week, the purring stopped for the first time. Nothing. And I knew – they purr for pleasure and it takes energy. She couldn’t eat. She could hardly walk. The kidney disease had progressed and in vital ways, she was already gone. So I made that excruciating decision, and now I miss the loud meowing alarm that stirred me each morning and alerted me to meal or hug time. There is a deep hole in my heart and an empty, cold spot on my bed.

In the backyard, where we have buried countless goldfish and a pair of hamsters, there is a vintage ceramic cat doorstop marking the mound where Audrey Jane rests. My daughters decorated an organic cotton pillowcase to use as a shroud, and it was something, the sweet epithets penned, the sun and flowers scrawled. It offered closure but the pain and guilt still lingers.

It is hard to forgive yourself for choosing death for another being; any being that deserved life. That’s why humane organizations like the SPCA offer counseling to support people grieving the loss of a pet.

There was no sequel to Marley and Me offering tips on coping, so we depend on the wisdom of health care pros to guide us along that path to letting go. Pet euthanasia specialist, Hilary Brown, says our animals don’t consciously convey to us it is time to put them out of their misery, and that we must go with out instincts and understand that we are actually giving our terminally ill pets the “ultimate gift” in setting them free.

“From the moment we embrace these animals when they first grace our lives, every day is one day closer to the day they must abandon their very temporary and faulty bodies and return to the state of total perfection and rapture they have always deserved,” says Brown. Today is a good day, perhaps tomorrow will be, too, and perhaps next week and the weeks of months after. But there will eventually be a winding down and we must not let that part of the cycle become our enemy.”

Brown also offers a compassionate perspective when it comes to supporting our vets who have chosen a career of healing and must be the one to inject what she terms the “freedom elixir”.

“I always place my hand on top of his hand that holds the syringe,” Brown explains. “I want to shoulder that burden with him so he’s not alone. The law says the vet is the one licensed to administer the shot, not me, but a much higher law says this is the responsibility that I undertook on the day I welcomed that pet into my life forever.”

One could argue the responsibility isn’t anything compared to deciding to end life support for a failing, one-pound preemie infant or to call a Dr. Kevorkian when a terminally ill parent requests an end to intervention. But I say it’s all relative. And for some, cats and dogs make the best relatives of all.

Images: IMDB, Luanne Bradley

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Therapeutic gardening has become a method of recovery, both physical and mental, for Alzheimer’s patients, the physically handicapped, injured or ill patients, and troubled or abused children. According to the Methodist Respite Care Center in Williamsburg, VA, “All [of their therapeutic] projects use gardening and horticultural activities to improve physical health, mental health, expand recreational options and generally improve one’s health and well-being.” This method of therapy is reported to reduce stress, stimulate the senses, and creates bonds with nature and other people.

Brightly colored annuals, such as marigolds, impatiens and cosmos, are a few flowers of choice in therapeutic gardening to provide a sensory experience for patients. Vegetable and herb gardens are also planted and tended to add taste and scent to the experience.

Participants have the pleasure of tasting the “fruits of their labor,” plucked straight off the vine, or can take home fresh, fragrant herbs to cook with.

All in all, this new form of therapy provides a cost-effective, relaxing, and sociable way to improve health for many people, while providing volunteer positions for gardening enthusiasts who desire to give back to their communities.

Article by Emily Wallace for DivineCaroline. First published March 2010.

Related DivineCaroline posts:

• Living a Sensual Life Through Farming
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Image: Rich Legg

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You drop a plate on the floor – crack! Your tights ladder when you’re putting them on. Your bicycle tire starts emitting a sad little whine. Paintwork gets scratched, shoes leak, cloths fray and holes appear where you least want them – often the prelude to a poignant, reluctant parting of ways. Wouldn’t it be nice if things fixed themselves?

Enter the exciting new world of self-healing. Far from a feelgood slogan or an eyebrow-raising euphemism (ahem), it’s the scientific development of non-living materials that act like biological systems to repair themselves.

Last year we were stunned by the unveiling of a type of rubber with unusually densely-packed chemical bonds. Cut it into two pieces, push them back together, and these bonds latch together just as tightly as in the original piece. In other words, it heals perfectly (and perfectly green). Just imagine if your tights were made from a similar material – you won’t be the first to.

But the most exciting new materials are those modeled on biological vascular systems. The way our bodies heal is truly amazing – and something like a simple grazed elbow can be the start of a process so thrifty, clever and dazzlingly effective that it makes plastic surgery look like strip-mining.

There’s much we can learn – and we’ve already started looking at new materials that are laced with microcapsules containing healing agents. If a break forms, these capsules rupture and the “wound” is flooded with substances that repair the damage. Astounding. And just when we think we’ve got our heads around all this Nature-copying wizardry…along comes a type of paint with scratches that heal in the sun.

In the drive to make everyone look twice at what they’re throwing away, products that continually look and work as good as new would be a priceless resource – and go a long way towards healing our broken relationship with our possessions.

Image: djeucalyptus

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You’ve seen animals licking their wounds. And maybe the first thing you do when you cut your finger is put it in your mouth and suck on it for a moment. It turns out these instinctive urges have good reason: scientists in the Netherlands have isolated a compound in human saliva that not only kills bacteria but actually promotes healing. This would explain why oral wounds like tooth extractions and tongue piercings heal so quickly. It’s nurture, by nature.

The scientists hope to synthesize this compound and use it to help hard-to-heal wounds like diabetic ulcers and burn traumas. But remember, you’ve got your own anti-bacterial and healing compounds right there in your mouth, so if you’re caught somewhere without a first aid kit – just spit!

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