ColumnDisgusted by overwhelming portions of salacious fare served up on the Internet? In today’s “click, monitor, push” information-marketing world, what we “see” is about more than algorithms—it’s about who we are.

I looked at a leaked photo and saw a naked celebrity. To be honest, while I didn’t realize what was on the other end of the hyperlink, there was probably enough information surrounding it that I should have known better. It was an impulse move (part curious, part prurient, part lazy) and I’m a little disgusted with myself for not thinking through my click. It’s not something I’m continuing to beat myself up about, but nevertheless, the event was indeed criminal and my choice was complicit. I’m sorry I did it.

I’m usually better than that when it comes to sensationalism and/or potential privacy breaches (of celebs or otherwise). I didn’t watch the Ray Rice wife-beating elevator video or the ISIL beheadings, I avoid “Read this Fucking Story!” headlines like the plague and I try to train a hypercritical eye on anything dubbed “trending.” I do this because at the end of the day, I know that in many ways I am what I click, and I do my best to exert at least a modicum of control over my intentions and actions when it comes to media consumption.

The consumption-equals-self concept (I think it began with “you are what you eat”) is not a new phenomenon, particularly in the media marketplace. I’m one of those before-and-after folk who, unlike the digital natives, came of age without an Internet, reading paper-based things and taking in what I could through a mere four or six channels on a rabbit-eared television set. Even then, though, I knew that my media interactions had implications beyond the ink stains on my fingers and my Sonny & Cher-strained eyeballs. I knew that my choices percolated up to sinister marketing meetings where decisions were made as to who I was (i.e., my demographic) and what I would be sold going forward.

In some ways, it seemed like a fair deal. I spoke with my choices. The powers that be listened and responded. Quid pro quo, right? (I confess that I secretly wished we were a Nielsen family.) But, still, there was something safely delayed about these transactions. It took time for Madison Avenue, the networks and the rest to understand my habits, construct customized offerings and deliver what I seemed to be willing to view. I assumed I’d eventually get more of what I thought I wanted, but the Mad Men and Media Merchants were somehow remote; there was some solace in the lack of immediacy.

Today’s media is a different beast. Think the above mindspace-commerce formula on steroids. Better still, on crack. As I busily click away, information is instantaneously gathered, crunched and fed back to me in the form of related content. If I click on naked celebs, violent videos, popular tripe and crap like that, then boom!—more naked celebs, violent videos, popular tripe and crap like that. Simple, even for us nerds who know nothing about how the intertubes do the voodoo they do.

Today, we are each in the business of creating sophisticated DIY echo chambers of information. There’s a one-to-one relationship between our surfing and its feedback, with virtually no play in the wheel. Liberal information for liberals. Conservative for conservatives. Shopping for shoppers. Not slowly but surely, but here and now, again and again, in real time until you buy or, as the case may be, buy in.

Smile for the Clickbait

Okay, so it’s no secret, nor is it surprising, that countless soulless algorithms are digesting my info and creating a customized and finely tuned online media environment just for me. And this isn’t always a bad thing. Aside from my Nielsen aspirations, I’m okay when options for that end table I’ve been valiantly surfing for or the first-edition Hemingway I’ve been staring at for months on eBay magically appear in my Facebook feed. And who needs to see those inane (not-my-bent) political ravings or overzealous (not-my-belief-system) religious messages. Not me. And through tech wizardry, I don’t have to, right? Huzzah!

But there’s more to it than that, isn’t there? If we stare a little cross-eyed at our newsfeeds (wherever they reside), we can see what amounts to a selfie—a homemade portrait that depicts something between an accurate view of who we are and some distorted caricature of our likeness. Beyond the algorithmic give and take, the scrolling image reflects something about us and our desires. It’s been said that, if nothing else, we can decide what we pay attention to. In the end, such choices amount to no small thing.

This is not to say that these choices are always easy ones. When the video surfaced of NFL running back Ray Rice assaulting his wife in an elevator, for example, I faced a decision: To click or not to click? No? Maybe, but consider that its going viral led to a much-needed culture storm that continues to reverberate beyond the football league; the phenomenon of millions of people watching that recorded crime translated into critical knowledge and a subsequent national uproar.

But managing my relationship with information is also critical. Can I understand an issue without joining an ugly horde of voyeurs? Can I develop an internal brain-muscle memory that tells me that when I look at something I’ll be participating in a media marketing measurement system that will not only blow back to my own info trough but to the world’s as well?

Consider the birth of widespread disintermediated information flow, which in large part came in the form of the website known as Digg. The site (and its once-ubiquitous share buttons) was a prototype for grander social media to come (Facebook, Twitter and the like) and a crucial turning point in the democratization of editorial decision-making. (Full disclosure: My brother was CEO at the time.) In its 2009 heyday, Digg boasted 45 million users.

It more or less worked like this: When you came across something on the Web that interested you, you could Digg it by clicking a button associated with the story. This acted essentially as a thumbs-up vote, which would then determine its rise or fall on the Digg homepage. This meant users chose what was top-priority news and what wasn’t. The upside was enormous: Events previously buried by jaded, ignorant or bought editorial gatekeepers could jump to the top of the pops.

As with most big ideas, however, there’s a double edge to this otherwise gallant swordplay. If the world is watching, say, the Arab Spring or a maybe an important political debate, and that activity is instantly measured and widely promoted based on its popularity, that’s a good thing. But what about mob rule? I remember when naked Paris Hilton photos rose to the top of the Web world (with Digg’s help, by the way). What else was happening on that day? I wonder.

Mirror, Mirror

In a world (go ahead, say it like the guy on the movie trailers—there’s a dubious air about all of this) where we clickers increasingly decide what’s news, what’s worth looking at and what’s not, we more or less get exactly what we deserve. We can debate all millennium about the advantages or disadvantages of such people power (mob rule?) or algorithm-based marketing (stalking?), but the truth is, in one form or another, these formulas have been in play since well before the penny press—and they’re here to stay. Bitching about it is kind of like cooking dinner and then complaining that the chef is a talentless hack who’s serving up a bunch of slop.

What’s important, then, is how what we see on our screens is up to us as a culture of users—which, of course, means it’s ultimately up to us as individuals. There’s black and white—I should not have opened the naked celeb link. It shouldn’t have taken much thought to know what I was doing and thus supporting. And then there’s nuance—I can follow certain stories (domestic violence vis-à-vis Ray Rice or Middle East policy vis-à-vis the ISIL insanity) without voting for the dissemination of grotesque and sometimes even criminal bits and bytes on the Web.

What’s required for navigating this, on a personal level, is taking a moment to reflect before we open a link. Why do we blindly click? Do we think about the blowback that will be mainlined not only into our own info-intake valves, but into our culture as a whole? All told, our impulses are too often sadly unmediated: Curious. (What’s everyone going on about?) Prurient. (“She’s kind of hot. What’s behind this curtain?”) Lazy. (Cool! Click!) Going forward, I’m going to try to do a better job of casting my brain-space ballot. And the next time I feel the urge to get all indignant about “information” that comes my way, I’ll keep this in mind: Often, we get just what we ask for.

Scott Adelson is EcoSalon’s Senior Editor of HyperKulture, a monthly column that explores opening cultural doors to initiate personal change. He is also the author of InPRINT, which reviews and discusses books, new and old. You can reach him at scott at adelson dot org and follow him @scottadelson on Twitter.

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HyperKulture: You May Ask Yourself, ‘How Did I Get Here?’ – The Pitfalls of Passion Drift

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Images: Chris Gilmore (top), SamahR (middle) and Eiti Kimura. 

The post Beyond the Algorithms – Don’t Look Now, But You Are What You Click: HyperKulture appeared first on EcoSalon.

When did we all start trying to look like celebrities? Is the selfie to blame?

In a recent op-ed piece for the New York Times, actor James Franco defended his love of the selfie. Clearly, the Instagram-obsessed Franco is a self most of us won’t complain about looking at…but it’s more than just his hotness that makes his selfies meaningful. He writes, “Attention is power. And if you are someone people are interested in, then the selfie provides something very powerful, from the most privileged perspective possible.”

Franco’s right. Attention is power. It’s why little kids jump around the rooms like maniacs to get their parents’ attention. It ensures that the energy goes towards the person making the scene. For a little kid, that’s kind of important. They’re little. Somewhat helpless. They need attention. But it’s a security issue we outgrow, usually. At least, we used to.

“[T]he selfie provides something very powerful, from the most privileged perspective possible…” It’s a really bold presumption, but Franco does make the important distinction: “if you are someone people are interested in,” that is. Did he just put us in our place?  Are we not interesting unless we’re as beautiful as James Franco? Or Lady Gaga or Justin Beiber?

Whether James Franco or Kanye West (or James Franco as Kanye West) or boring old me, someone is going to see what we post on our preferred social networks. Franco’s legion of fans on Instagram certainly garners more of an audience than the rest of us, but the point is really that someone is “watching” us virtually all of the time. And when we’ve got an audience—be it only on Facebook or Instagram—we inevitably start to perform, to play a role, pay more attention to whether or not we’re having a bad hair day.

The doppelganger game may have peaked on Facebook a few years ago, but it’s morphed into less of a game and more of a homework assignment these days. If you kind of look like Kim Kardashian, you might as well do what you can to look even more like her at all times. “Now, while the celebrity selfie is most powerful as a pseudo-personal moment, the noncelebrity selfie is a chance for subjects to glam it up, to show off a special side of themselves — dressing up for a special occasion, or not dressing, which is a kind of preening that says, ‘There is something important about me that clothes hide, and I don’t want to hide’,” writes Franco. At least we have our options then. Glam it up or scale it way down. Either way, we’ve got an audience waiting for our noncelebrity selfies. But what fun is being a noncelebrity? We want A-list audiences and Beiber-esque fanclubs, too. We want cyberstalkers. But since we can’t have those, at least we’ve got companies eager to capitalize on our selfie-obsession. “The quantified self movement can be, and has been, exploited for profit. Once the quantified self became marketable, smart marketers and developers sprang into the vacuum, coming up with more ways to monitor more behaviors. Our quantified selves get us hooked on the products, platforms, and services that promise to make us better versions of ourselves,” writes Sarita Bhatt in FastCoexist. They love us. They really love us! Thank the lord.

Society has always been capable of handling a few self-obsessed narcissists. But the tide is shifting and the condition has spread deep and wide. “[A]s a culture, we seem to believe that it is vital to not only track, but post our personal actions on every possible social network,” writes Bhatt, “The world must know how many miles we ran, the scenic views that accompanied the run, and what we did afterwards to celebrate the run.” So, while we may be forced into the nonceleb class, we can live a pseudo-celeb life for our followers. They think we’re beautiful, right?

Of course, this epidemic “self movement” also leads the way for issues like body dysmorphic disorder, eating disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorders, anxiety and depression, not to mention the substance abuse and other ways we attempt to soothe ourselves from the stress our public personae put on us. Just like the celebrities we’re trying to emulate, we’re starting to suffer from the same disorders that often afflict people subject to high levels of adoration.

Franco defends the accusations that the selfie is an indicator of self-involvement, “in a visual culture, the selfie quickly and easily shows, not tells, how you’re feeling, where you are, what you’re doing,” he writes. But isn’t that also kind of making another equally important point? Why do we need to “quickly” or “easily” show how we’re feeling, where we are or what we’re doing? Can’t some of our lives be private? (Don’t answer that, NSA.)

Our sense of self-worth, the Mister Rogers kind of beauty that we’ve been taught matters most of all, has  taken a backseat to how pouty our lips look in the bathroom mirror selfie we just took. We’re in competition with everyone else online. If we can’t be as important as James Franco, at least we can make other people in our feed seem less important than us. But the selfie is a “tool of communication” more than vanity, according to Franco. It’s what we use to give the world “a sense of who we are.” And on that, I couldn’t agree with him more. But with a few caveats: Who are we, really? Do we know? Do we want to? And can we be beautiful without an audience?

Keep in touch with Jill on Twitter @jillettinger

Related on EcoSalon

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Image: ivana vasilj

The post Your Selfie and the Meaning of Beauty (According to the Internet and James Franco) appeared first on EcoSalon.

I dare you to watch this heartwarming video and not cry. Sarah and Paige are both missing parts of their arms, and their moms brought them together via the International Child Amputee Network (just thinking that such an organization even exists breaks my heart). Over the last 8 years, the two girls have formed an intense bond, using Internet video chat service Skype (full disclosure: the video is actually an ad for Skype). Though separated by many miles (hometowns are in New Zealand and Indiana in the US), they are clearly best friends. Watch to see the terrific surprise and enjoy the beauty of friendship!  

Related on Ecosalon: 

This teenager will break your heart with her truth about being a woman (video) 

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Geena Davis is a Total Badass (Video)

The post Get Your Tissues Ready: Amputee Teenage Best Friends Are Pure Joy (Video) appeared first on EcoSalon.

The internet is in an uproar about a bill called CISPA, but why? Here’s a simple primer on what this bill is and why it (and all its lookalikes) needs to be stopped.

Do you remember SOPA and PIPA? These two so-called internet security bills would, in the words of the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF), “hamper innovation, kill jobs, wreak havoc on Internet security, and undermine free speech.” We’re running low on outlets for true free speech in this world, so naturally, the interwebs were none too pleased.

In 2012, SOPA and PIPA provoked an internet-wide protest that saw some of the world’s most prominent websites go black, sporting only information pages about why the bills needed to be stopped. And it worked. SOPA and PIPA disappeared and we went about our business; but many knew the fight for our internet freedom and privacy wasn’t over. Turns out SOPA and PIPA were busy while on vacation, and now CISPA, a bill many are calling their “bastard offspring” is working its way through our government.

But what is this controversial bill, and why haven’t we seen the internet-wide blackout that SOPA and PIPA ignited?

Well, for one thing, America has had its fair share of distracting disasters in the last few weeks. But while we were mourning Boston, an even bigger threat to our rights was quietly passed by the House of Representatives. Although the Senate says it will shelve the bill in favor of drafting its own version, it’s imperative that Americans be informed about what’s at stake.

WHO

CISPA was introduced by U.S. Representative Michael Rogers (R-MI) back in 2011, but has received support from both sides of the aisle in the form of 111 co-sponsors. In an interesting twist, major web and tech entities such as Google, Mozilla, Wikipedia and Facebook, are not coming out in opposition of CISPA like they did with SOPA and PIPA. Some even support it. More about this later…

WHAT

CISPA stands for Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act (CISPA). Sounds so nice doesn’t it? Who doesn’t love to share and be protected? If passed, CISPA would allow for voluntary information sharing between private companies and the government in the event of a cyber attack. If the government detects a cyber attack that might take down Facebook or Google, for example, they could notify those companies. At the same time, Facebook or Google could inform the feds if they notice unusual activity on their networks that might suggest a cyber attack (PG Mag).

WHY (Should You Care?)

Supporters of the bill say that it’s a necessary upgrade to the National Security Act of 1947, which does not cover cyber crimes. Politicians in the late 1940s couldn’t have possibly foreseen the pain of being hacked or becoming a victim of identity theft, so this part seems fairly benign as well. No one wants World World III to start because another country hacked into the military mainframe and fired off some missiles. While this is scary (but unlikely) it’s the other things the government and its corporate cronies could do with this power that’s truly terrifying.

Critics say that “CISPA is an affront to American civil liberties, and the privacy of its citizens.” According to the EFF, “the bill grants broad new powers, allowing companies to identify and obtain “threat information” by looking at your private information.” This would allow companies to easily hand over users’ private information to the government thanks to a liability clause (something that wasn’t included in SOPA/PIPA, and a main reason why big tech companies that opposed those bills now support CISPA. They have far less to lose). This, according to the EFF “essentially means CISPA would override the relevant provisions in all other laws—including privacy laws.”

With the recent passage of the NDAA, a measure that allows “indefinite detention of American citizens without due process at the discretion of the President,” the idea of who or what could be considered a “cyber threat” becomes much murkier. How many of us have shared criticism of our government or supported activists online? What happens if Facebook and Uncle Sam decide to create a handy list of online dissenters just in case? Your privacy and rights go out the window, that’s what.

And there’s also the reality that CISPA could not only enable–but possibly require–employees to provide their bosses with the passwords to their personal social media accounts. An amendment that would have prevented this was voted down by the House of Representatives. Lovely public servants, aren’t they?

WHEN

CISPA was passed in the House of Representatives on April 26, 2012, but was not passed by the U.S. Senate. President Obama’s advisers have argued that the bill lacks confidentiality and civil liberties safeguards and they advised him to veto it. In February 2013 the House reintroduced the bill and passed it on April 18, 2013.

THE GOOD NEWS

CISPA is dead for now and the White House still says it will veto any cyber security bill that doesn’t adequately protect civil liberties. But the same administration also passed the NDAA, so take that with a grain of salt.

Image: danitgeek/deviant art

The post CISPA: What It Is And Why You Should Care appeared first on EcoSalon.

Take a look at the bottom of our posts. What has changed?

Yep – you don’t have to be logged into Facebook to comment anymore. We’ve gone back to a basic commenting process that makes it super-easy for anyone to leave their thoughts…and that’s exactly why we’ve done it.

Over the last 4 years we’ve written about a lot of things. We’ve cheerleaded, we’ve lambasted, we’ve banged our drums and we’ve pinned our hearts to our sleeves. In short – we’ve cared, unapologetically. If we’ve written about it, we have feelings on the matter and we’re not shy about showing it.

Sometimes you don’t agree with us. And frankly? We love that. We loved it when you argued on the side of PETA.  We loved it when you challenged our thoughts on a certain fast-food chain. When Sarah objected to NASA firing a probe into the Moon, we all argued the point in the comments. When Tina listed 15 foods to boost your metabolism, you enriched the post no end by adding links, testaments and useful tips of your own. You helped us reach consensus on what defines “toxic.” You’ve agreed, you’ve disagreed, you’ve cheered us on and called us out – and you’ve kept us honest, because we don’t speak for everyone and hey, we’re not perfect.

(I know, so hard to believe).

It’s your discussion and your input that turned EcoSalon into the platform we always hoped it would be – and we think a third-party Facebook comments plugin has been getting in the way of that healthy, exciting dialogue. So now we’ve ditched it. We don’t want to stifle your voice or keep you at a distance – we want you to show us how the issues we write about affect you.

The safeties are off, people.

Feel free to give us a piece of your mind.

Image: puliarf

The post We Like Your Brain: Discuss appeared first on EcoSalon.

Feeling bored by the Internet? Want to see something fun & useful that will truly rock your socks off and might just make your day?

Let us begin.

Sustainable Energy – Without The Hot Air – David JC MacKay

Described by Boing Boing editor Cory Doctorow as “the Freakonomics of conservation, climate and energy”, this is a book you shouldn’t miss, not least because it’s available entirely for free. You can buy the book on Amazon (note the thirty-nine 5-star reviews) – but you can also read the entire contents online or download them in PDF form, free of charge.

Author MacKay is an English Physics professor, so he really knows his stuff. What is remarkable is how elegantly and breezily he conveys it. (This is no ponderous high school textbook). Want to know what it would really take to balance the energy budget? Want to know the real numbers behind renewable energy? This is the book for you.

The Brain Pickings of Maria Popova

Since 2005, Wired and The Atlantic writer Maria Popova has been reading more books than most people get through in a lifetime. If that wasn’t enough, she only reads good books – the most fascinating, quirky, inspiring and thought-filled reading material lining our shelves today. And if that wasn’t enough, she blogs about them too. Her website, Brain Pickings, now gets more traffic than the New York Review of Books, and no wonder – it’s a treasure-trove of suggested reads that may very well make you a better human being.

(Check out an interview with Maria here).

Read The Best Journalism On The Internet

Love good writing? Love reading? Love knowing what’s really going on in the world? Check out our reading list or our recent post on 10 sources of quality journalism – but if you don’t want to have to trawl for the good stuff yourself, there are websites that curate and archive the most fearless, insightful and beautifully-written journalism out there.

Try Longform (above)…

…and Longreads, and Byliner.

For a one-stop bookmarking of the good stuff, check out Conor Friedersdorf’s list of nearly 100 pieces of superb journalism. And if you have a Kindle – why not use Klip.me to send these articles to it, and do your reading offline?

Browse the Open Culture Language List

Being bilingual gives your brain a good workout – we all know this, but there’s increasing amounts of scientific evidence to back it up. So why not take 10 minutes out of your day and start a new language? Problem: those courses can be pricey. Solution: this colossal archive of  free resources (ebooks, audio, video) for learning 40 languages from Arabic to Yiddish. (Thank you kindly, Open Culture).

Sloth Yourself Silly 

To keep your smile topped up, watch this trailer for Animal Planet’s Meet The Sloths every day. And if that doesn’t work, scroll through these 111 adorable pictures of them at Buzzfeed. Sloths – they bring the happy. (More cuteness at Slothville).

See The World Up Close

Earlier this year the Suomi National Polar-orbiting Partnership satellite orbited our planet six times and took a series of staggeringly detailed images that NASA stitched together and released on Flickr. The above image is one; this is the other. Incredibly beautiful, yes – but we’re not done yet. Under the “View All Sizes” buttons on each page you’ll find the original high-resolution image…and they will blow your mind: (Hi-Res Image 1)  (Hi-Res Image 2)

Know At A Glance When Your Edible Garden Is In Season

As you may have guessed by now, we love infographics – but we were particularly taken with this set from the good folk at Chasing Delicious. Work out when your fruit, vegetables and herbs are in season, and plan your meals accordingly.

Listen To Neil Gaiman Talk About Doing What You Love

A few months ago author Neil Gaiman was awarded an honorary doctorate by the University of the Arts in Philadelphia, and was asked to give the Keynote Address to the 2012 graduating class. The speech he gave has become an internet phenomenon, and is a must-watch for anyone doing anything creative (read: everyone).

For those on a tight schedule, the transcript is here.

Explore An Idea a Day With The Change This Manifestos

Running since 2004 and born of an idea by Seth Godin, the Change This manifestos are short, succinct and above all fun downloadable books built around ideas. Their authors are some of the internet’s smartest people (the aformentioned Seth Godin is a contributor). There are hundreds of titles to choose from, they’re all easy on the eyes and stretchy on the brain – and they’re all completely free. Get started here.

Let Jodi Ettenberg, Legal Nomad, Show You A World Of Food

Jodi Ettenberg is a globe-trotting food nut with a thing for spices and gluten-free cooking. An ex-lawyer, she’s been traveling the world since 2008 and garnering mentions in the New York Times and on Jason Kottke’s super-popular blog. Her site is a wealth of tips on traveling the world, but for sheer eye-candy you’d be wise to go to her food page and start clicking for some really incredible nom-shots.

Images: MSVG, orangeacid, NASA Goddard Photo & Video and David JC MacKay.

The post Bored? Here Are 10 Awesome Free Things On The Internet appeared first on EcoSalon.

Tired of whiny status updates and thinly veiled bragging? Forget Facebook – do these 20 things instead.

Be honest: How many times do you check Facebook throughout the day? Whenever you’re bored, you log in, scrolling through the news feed to see your friend complaining about work for the thousandth time this week, your cousin bragging about her glorious Caribbean vacation and a high school classmate’s cheerful, disgustingly detailed potty training updates. You leave an inane comment on a photo, roll your eyes at your uncle’s misguided Tea Party political posts and log out feeling irritable and annoyed. Why do we do this to ourselves? Facebook can be great for keeping up with friends and family, but there are so many ways that we could use that time that would actually be beneficial to our well-being.

Think Facebook isn’t a big time-sink in your life? Try adding it up. The average U.S. Facebook user logged a rather horrifying seven hours and 46 minutes per month as of August 2011, and that figure has probably risen since then. Imagine if you spent all of that time on something that makes you feel genuinely happy, grounded and relaxed. Here are 20 suggestions, from letter-writing to exploring your neighborhood.

Read a Book

Preferably something that doesn’t involve politics or potty training. There are few things better than getting lost in a good book, and the drama in the storyline will be infinitely more satisfying than the drama of your Facebook friends.

Write a Letter

The internet and ever-increasing postage rates have made letter-writing a lost art. Even those of us who consider ourselves writers are relying far too much on the computer, when writing a personal note in our own hand and sending it by mail would feel so much more authentic.

Take a Walk

Perhaps the fetid air and dim fluorescent lighting of your office have dulled your senses, or you’ve been sitting in front of that computer so long you’ve forgotten, but there’s a whole world out there, and it’s awfully beautiful. Stretch your legs and get some sunlight on your skin and you’ll return feeling energetic and inspired.

Talk to a Stranger

On Facebook we tend to be stuck in our limited social circles, and it’s true that it’s really not a great idea to “friend” any random stranger that sends you a request. But in the real world, there are dozens of opportunities every day for you to meet someone new and interesting. Compliment someone on their outfit, laugh about the long line at the coffee shop or stop that woman who smiles at you every morning when you cross each other on the street.

Cook a Good Meal

“But I don’t have time to cook anything other than microwave soup,” you protest, as you sit down in front of your laptop with that nasty mug of MSG mess. Liar. Not every meal takes a lot of time to prepare. You can whip yourself up a simple meal made of whole, fresh ingredients in the amount of time that you’d normally be staring listlessly at your computer screen.

Pet An Animal

There’s a reason why animals are often used for therapeutic purposes. Just petting an animal can lower your blood pressure and make you feel less stressed. Call your cat over for a cuddle, spend a few minutes playing with your dog or make a visit to the animal shelter just to brighten a homeless pet’s day.

Call Someone You Love

Oh, look at that, your cousin Sarah just announced her pregnancy on Facebook. Instead of just “liking” her post, why not give her a call? Sure, Facebook makes it easy and convenient to keep up with everyone, and can actually save time and foster more interaction with your friends and family. But it’s not a total replacement for phone calls and face time (whether we’re talking in person or FaceTime, copyright Apple Inc.)

Read Something Smart

The internet is chock full of gossip sites, bad news and trolls who would just love to ruin your day. But there are plenty of blogs and websites that offer inspiring, intelligent and thought-provoking articles. Take fifteen minutes to read something that will make you say “wow” in a good way. A few notable ideas include The Atlantic, This is Colossal, GOOD, and, of course, EcoSalon. (You knew that was coming, right?)

Make Yourself Laugh

Then again, if reading celebrity gossip makes you smile, go for it. Indulge in some low-brow humor. Laugh at other people’s horrifying AutoCorrects, snarky takes on bad fashion or semi-literate cat photo captions. And if you end up at The Onion, Funny or Die or Cracked, make sure your boss isn’t around, because you aren’t going to be able to control yourself.

Write Down Your Thoughts

When’s the last time you took a moment to write in a journal, or even just scrawl a few thoughts on a paper napkin? It doesn’t have to be something that you dedicate yourself to every day; just writing out what’s on your mind can sometimes provide clarity and perspective that can help you solve problems and move forward.

Catch Some Culture

We’re all more interesting and well-rounded when we’re exposed to arts and culture on a regular basis. Get out and see a play, go to an art opening, join a book club, enjoy an improv group or sample your region’s local specialties. Isn’t that more fun than staring at a computer screen?

Do Yoga

Even if you’re at work. Just a few minutes a day can make you feel more limber and relaxed. Yoga Journal has six stretches you can do at your desk, and none of them are the sort of thing that will have your co-workers raising their eyebrows. If you’re at home, get yourself a beginner’s yoga DVD and give yourself some quiet time to focus on your own well-being.

Organize Your Desk

If you instinctively avoid the right side of your top desk drawer because you know you left an orange in there about six months ago and never retrieved it, it’s about time to tackle that. It’ll make you feel so much better. Even if you’re not quite at the five-year-old candy bar and moldy fruit level, simply organizing your papers and making everything look nice and tidy can be a relief.

Take a Class

If you’re like the average person and really spend eight hours a month on Facebook, you could easily take that time to learn something new for two hours a week. Check out the continuing education courses at your local community college or other learning opportunities in your area. You could be learning how to knit, play an instrument, salsa dance or write poetry.

Volunteer

That same eight hours would be a huge boon to any number of organizations in your community that are hurting for help. Wildlife rehabilitation centers, animal shelters, litter clean-up groups, homeless shelters and activists for causes of all kinds would love to have you dedicate four hours of your time, every other week.

Have a Picnic

Even if you aren’t going any farther than the little park down the street, getting out for a picnic feels like a mini vacation. Make yourself something fun, like a bento box or a romantic meal for one. Hey. You deserve it.

Catch Up on Email

Chances are, your inbox is practically overflowing with unread or unanswered messages, whether they’re from friends and family members, or just junk. Take a few minutes to go through it and respond to those that deserve attention, drop all of those newsletters you want to save into a separate folder and unsubscribe from the unwanted junk mail. You’ll feel less stressed within minutes.

Do Something Creative

Don’t say you aren’t the creative type – you have it in you, whether you let yourself believe it or not. Even if you’re just doodling, scrapbooking or adding some pretty garnishes to a meal, it’s good for the brain and the soul.

Explore Your Neighborhood

You drive through it every day, and you think you know it, but unless you’ve taken a nice, slow walk through it with your eyes wide open, you haven’t really discovered it yet. There could be a nature trail you don’t know about, a perfect bench for reading or some berry bushes just begging to be harvested (and urban foraging is fun!)

Meditate

Put on some noise-canceling headphones, play relaxing, repetitive music, close your eyes and relax your body. Focus on your breath until the chatter in your mind fades away. If it helps, visualize a calming place, like a mountaintop, a secret garden or the sea. Once you learn to clear your mind, meditation can be your best defense against the irritations of everyday life.

Photos: photosteve101, jumpinjimmyjava, herrylawford, gamene

The post 20 Things to Do Instead of Being on Facebook appeared first on EcoSalon.

ColumnNeed to look good on Facebook? Ask an editor.

Presenting yourself as the envy of everyone’s Facebook wall comes down to editing (that we’d want to do this is a foregone conclusion). As a colleague said recently, “Editing is the skill of the century.” Your digital life, unedited? So MySpace. This is Facebook, where the savvy Eye of social discernment is a requisite. You’ve got walls. Subscriptions. Integrated tweets. Photo albums. Friends tagging god-knows-what (probably your arm from the fat side). It’s a borg on there, and you’ll need to practice some serious curation of your life to be perceived like-ably. You want the highs to be high, the lows to be slightly less high, and the ex to know your arms are still skinny. As every good editor knows, the product is all in the packaging. Present your life from the most pleasing angle, and don’t forget the witty caption! Here’s how.

Lolcats

IRL: You’ve got guests in town. Your cat cannot handle the den of estrogen that your flat has become and meows – bleats, really – all night long, keeping both you and your guests in the other room miserably half-asleep well into sunrise. The cat settles in for slumber, of course, right at the time you all have to wake up for work on Monday morning. You find yourself wondering if your cat would even notice if you gave it away.

How to Facebook it: Cheezburger it up and put a caption on it. Lol all the way to the likes. Cats are hilarious, always! Suggested captions:

IM IN UR SLEEP, DISRUPTIN UR ZZZ

MEOWS-ON-REPEAT: EVEN MORE ANNOYING THAN DUBSTEP

HOSTESS KITTEH: TEH GUESTS HAZ OVERSTAYED TEH WELCOMEZ

Workaday Wonderful

IRL: You’re stuck in the worst-of-the-worst conference on earth, the kind for corporate types in need of the downlow, or lowdown, on how to do the Twitter. You sneak out of the “You Need a Social Media Strategy!” session with the Arial Powerpoint slides about engagement and channels delivered by the woman decked in menopausal jewelry wearing highwater gabardine trousers. You race to catch the de Kooning exhibit at MoMA for 30 life-giving minutes before heading back in for the rest of the sessions. At the break, you’re fed stale grocery store bagels slathered in Kraft cream cheese, and hi, you are allergic to gluten and also really prefer organic dairy. You’ll have to catch up on all your work that night where you’ll eat string cheese, also not organic, and alternate cans of Illy and Freixenet from the corner deli because you don’t have time to go to dinner. And, you did not bring enough pairs of underwear, because it’s suddenly your time of the month.

How to Facebook it: Snap and post a shot of the de Kooning sign in the lobby (angle: casually askew; interest point: allow single corner pop of color). Prepare for the “You have such a fabulous jet-setting life!” comments. You’ll need that validation to retain consciousness through “Is Your Website Sticky?”

Being Informed

IRL: Your teetering stack of unread New Yorkers threatens to knock a tooth out in your sleep any night now, you’re only halfway into the novel your best friend gave you for Christmas (and neither one of you even celebrates the holidays!), your bookmarks are so clogged you’re getting warning emails from Xmarks, and you still haven’t finished the latest Seth Godin bestseller.

How to Facebook it: Post the Portlandia “Did You Read?” clip below and caption as follows: “Funny because it’s so true!” You need to outsource your reading at this point. You just need to look like you read, except not so much that it looks like your career isn’t on fire.

Dining Out

IRL: The bread is a burnt offering, the hipster waiters do not approve of your lack of facial hair and you’re pretty sure there was just a shooting outside the vintage Ray Ban and ski sweater shop.

How to Facebook it: Just post a picture of the mussels and Cava, cropping out the bread and beards. Appropriate caption: “Just another night of foodie fun in the Mission!” #nofilter (#liar #andyouliveinPacificHeights #byachurch #notthecoolchurch #becausethatsintheMission)

Being Popular and Successful

IRL: No one shows up to your event except your staff and that one weird guy who always comes to your events. Your dad.

How to Facebook it: The bartender and most attractive bar patrons will never notice you’re taking pictures of them and claiming them as your own. Jen, right? She looks like a Jen.

Your Love Life

IRL: You’re being pestered by no less than six suitors you could care less about and the one you want (the cute one, of course) is totes noncommits. Or, you haven’t had sex in over a year and you’re 28 and even your mother who waited until marriage thinks there is something unhealthy about this. Or you’re using Facebook to stalk your ex. When he finally blocks you, you resort to pleading with your friends to let you comb his photos for signs of a new girlfriend via their accounts. So, you’re still stalking your ex. Any way you work it, the picture isn’t pretty. Or is it? No need for the cutting room floor: we can so save this content!

How to Facebook: Go out to dinner every night with a string of your 100%-just-friends male friends and check in to the restaurants anyway. “Lisa has checked into Gary Danko with Joe.” That’ll learn those pestering suitors, all right. To alleviate Mom’s concerns, post updates like “Yet another crazy night! Can’t wait to get some sleep tonight!” and let her find relief in her own conclusions. For everything else, post a humble brag about the neighbor spotting you naked through the kitchen window, tee-hee! Leave out the part about him being 99. Or gay. Or blind.

Family Fun

IRL: Your grandmother dies on Christmas Day, a cousin reveals the Alice-in-Wonderland extent of his mental illness to you over too many eggnogs, your aunt announces she is getting divorced because she’s actually lesbian and your uncle is also out – of work (again). You develop a raging yeast infection. On your face. Probably from all the bourbon you’re drinking to cope.

How to Facebook it: “Feeling so grateful despite life’s challenges this holiday season!” and bask in the approving likes.

Simply leave off the “to be alive…I guess” part.

Conclusion to Column

IRL: Love, loss, hipsters, hashtags. We’ve covered it all.

How I’ll Facebook it: As if I’d post this to Facebook!

This is the latest installment in your editor’s column, The Insider’s Guide to Life.

Image: Francisco Vargas

The post The Insider’s Guide to Life: How to Be More ‘Likeable’ in Any Situation appeared first on EcoSalon.

ColumnWhen trolls invade real life.

Last week, I answered my cell phone while pulling up to a stop sign in my car. I will be the second or third to admit using your cell phone while driving is irresponsible; that’s why I don’t do it. I use a hands-free set. But I hadn’t even had the chance to reach for my set when two cyclists pulled in front of my car and began berating me. It took me a moment to realize this was what was happening, because one was taking a photograph of me with his camera. Flash-blinded, I slowly registered that the other cyclist was actually yelling with a level of smug approaching orgasmic: “What you are doing is ILLEGAL and DISTRACTING! You are BREAKING THE LAW! Do you understand how dangerous this is?” I appreciated the careful enunciation, but it was that last dollop of condescension I found the most delicious. It’s just one more reason to date a cyclist! So I can run him over.

It was true. I’d driven all of one block in a residential neighborhood – mine, and this is important – at the feckless speed of 20 miles per hour whilst on my phone. Even though I hung up the phone (more out of incredulity than guilt), the two cyclists continued behind me for two more blocks, deeply enjoying their special mission. Which is why I can report firsthand that being yelled at for nothing much in particular for two blocks is DISTRACTING. So distracting, I temporarily got disoriented in my own neighborhood and drove blindly for several minutes, pedestrians be damned.

Trolling happens all day online. It’s par for the virtual course. The internet is just full of uptight cyclists with cameras ready to reprimand naughty girls in shiny cars on cell phones. You never know what That Guy from High School will attempt on Facebook, or what angry email may come seething into your inbox ranting about some post of which the sender of said angry clearly missed the entire topic, not to mention point. A lot of times, they don’t even have the right site.

No big deal. But trolling in real life, by which I mean the one that doesn’t give you carpal tunnel? People, it’s time to get on down out of each others’ grills. I am concerned to find that trolling is finding its way even into the social habits of our noble cycling brethren. Perhaps they are an indicator species for the rest of humanity. The weak link, if you will.

I don’t think I’m the only one experiencing this. Our managing editor’s daughter was recently lectured by her school principal – this is elementary school – for having the nonconformist audacity to sport a single feather in her hair. It’s distracting! says the principal. No, it’s personality, and you don’t have to like it, but it’s none of your business.

The world is not out to offend us. Sadly, it is indifferent to us. And it turns out, other people are not just figments of our reality. They move and stuff. Unexpectedly, even!

Continuing in the automotive theme of trolling, because we couldn’t be more American right now: Last week I was at a dinner. I came out to find my car had quite literally been sandwiched bumper to bumper between two cars. Har, har. I marched into the corner cafe and asked around for the owners of both vehicles. No dice, just lattes. Forty minutes later, I was beginning to get annoyed. I called the police, and together we knocked on doors. At last, one hipster came darting out to move the geriatric green sedan backed up against my car’s nose. As he passed me, he preemptively put up his hands in such exaggerated fashion I thought he was crunking and was jealous because I don’t know how to. But no, he was just manning the defense. You’d think I had plans to eat his face. Now, maybe this kid has a habit of blocking other motorists and has developed this defensive mechanism to deflect violence to his person, but I’m going to venture he expected a big can of bitching out.

And then there’s the woman in the minivan who gave me the bird when I actually saved her from a fender-bender today. No good deed goes unflipped.

There have been enough of these incidents lately to give me pause before I go tweet and like some more. I started thinking about all the times I’ve snorted in derision at that one SUV that is the first on the hill to sign up for a crooked parking job. The times I’ve barely held my tongue, wanting to chide a child at the market for acting, unoriginally, childish. The moments where I have raised a fist, imagining what it might feel like to lift just the one finger. Pity it requires lifting a finger.

Maybe that woman on her cell phone needs to be on her cell phone. Maybe the guy who turned like an idiot isn’t such an idiot, just having an idiot moment. Maybe one day you need to be the idiot, and that’s okay. We actually don’t know why people are doing the stupid things they’re doing, and unless they’re putting us in harm’s way, we could care less so we should care less. People are limited, like furniture. Stupidity is as reliable as death and taxes, and more so in some places. Live and let live and live some more before perfection freaks us all out and we need plastic slipcovers.

By the way, the proper retort to all this is not, “But people really are that dumb and selfish. This is why I hate them.” The proper retort is: “I can’t believe you are knocking cycling, Sara. So not green. You obviously hate the planet.”

Let’s keep the trolling online where it belongs. This is practically what the internet was made for. Take that world, I have a blog!

tl;dr Be nice.

This is the latest installment in your editor’s column, The Insider’s Guide to Life.

Image: cinnamon_girl

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ColumnArmed with an iPad. And dangerous?

After a weekend in New York for eco fashion, it was off to Cape Cod with our managing editor, Amy DuFault, who makes her home here with her family: a musician-designer husband, two children and a cockapoo named Mick. They live in a classic New England cottage flanked by two ponds and woods. It’s April, but it’s still quite cold, and the winds whip through the bare trees and howl around the house. Inside, it’s warm and cozy, and Amy and I work on spring plans from the dining room instead of the office downstairs, where we can catch glimpses of house wrens and ospreys in the branches of the oaks and fat gray squirrels scurrying across the decks.

In between calls and ticking off to-do lists after dinner last night, Amy looked up from her laptop: “Sara? Let me just read you this email.” I know that tone of voice well. It’s the tone that comes with sharing a query from a hopeful writer wanting to cover the healing properties of crystals on a passionate case of eczema or the story about how slathering oneself in essential oil of Dalmation sage mixed with powdered placenta can cure the depression. It’s the tone that asks if we’d like to advertise cat psychics. Or perhaps we’d like to attend and cover the trade event in San Pedro about new 1.3763% more efficient copper conductors in industrial incinerators? It’s a dynamic industry.

This proposal was from one Clyle Reed, who suggested we introduce an eco-spirit section led (obviously) by him, and named for him. It was written in English, but appeared to have been improved upon by either a spambot or a drunk Scot. We really couldn’t decide. Topics would include his mother, his childhood, and his expertise in – among other gifts – spirit gathering.

We’ll blame the time of day; Amy responded. “Tell me more, Clyle.” This unleashed a flurry of emails from the Lord’s minion (his actual email address). We fell into an earnest – and loud – discussion about culture and psychology, or more accurately, online oddballs and insanity, forgetting that Amy’s young teenage son was nearby. As we read email after email from Clyle, aghast at what we’d semi-wittingly unleashed, her son ignored us, engrossed in whatever he was doing on his iPad. A few more minutes of our noisy analysis, and he sauntered into the kitchen. “Sometimes I really worry about what the world is coming to,” Amy said, shaking her head. And then we heard it. A snicker from the kitchen.

We looked at each other. We looked at the kitchen, graced by one immensely puffed up child, grinning ear to ear. He croaked “Clyle!” before collapsing into a fit of laughter as we shrunk in horror. The query, so strangely and brilliantly written. The succession of increasingly eerie ramblings, the insanity of which would have impressed John Updike; the perfectly crafted personal blog; the fresh gmail address. We’d been had by a thirteen-year-old, and he’d been audience to the entire progression of his macabre puppet show. Needless to say, he was thrilled by our total mortification. After we managed to make eye contact with him, we explained why the joke – while ingenious – was inappropriate. We sent him to bed post haste, so that we could laugh until we cried.

Kids these days. I remember rolling my eyes in frustration for months at trying to teach my mother how to use email (“You don’t use caps, Mom!”); this child had created an entire supporting ecosystem in mere minutes for his prank. He knew how, he accessed the services and tools, and he did it all in moments for a lark – for free. The internet is now home to one more blog which will never be used again, and Cape Cod is currently host to two embarrassed adults who, while fast themselves, are clearly no match for a seventh grade boy.

My own “kid” brother, who is 25, can text on his smartphone without looking at it. In fact most of the time it’s in his pocket. I’m not so much older than he is, but the rapid iteration of technology savvy – not just from generation to generation but between siblings and a year or few – is remarkable. He’d be an easy victim for Clyle, too.

The unreserved integration of technology by “the youth” scares many people, who fear for the innocence and safety of our children. I’m not one of them. While I don’t hole up in my house fervently watching for signs of the Singularity, I believe the fact that kids use technology without thinking about it – while we are still muttering and marveling over the details of the transition – is a positive thing.

Yes, there are predators on the internet, but there are predators IRL (that’s “in real life”), too, and what today’s kids intuitively grasp is that living online and off seamlessly is a productive, useful way to make life better because they can. They know this well enough to be wry about it, if last night’s missives from Clyle are any indication.

They’ll have to grapple with text thumb and their brains will be studied for changed learning patterns – consequences of change we are only beginning to understand and won’t be able to dismiss. But we should look at this cultural shift another way. One thing these children will not do is waste time. They will have grown up used to living in the present, all the time, and there will be little pause for regret, much less the gridlock and analysis paralysis of our social and political fabric. Jenny McCarthy’s inane babbling about indigo children has it all wrong; these are kids who simply have horse sense with no patience for horse shit. Their brains have been trained to look at reality and now, not myth and belief and maybe, and they’re used to witnessing the results of their actions in real time. We played Telephone with cans and strings and grew up to spin messaging with publicists. They’ve grown up with the iPhone and Android and Google cache, and they’re going to be kicking livid at what we’ve done.

So I doubt the results of this “tech stuff” will be anywhere near as apocalyptic as the cynics fear; I doubt things will even fray. Shame and love and altruism are still effective social motivators, and unless these suddenly evolve out of us thanks to “the Twitter,” will continue to be. Belonging is everything to humans, and our children will wonder why we cared so little about this, and why we did everything so stupidly. While we whine without ceasing about “their” infatuation with instant gratification – texting, Facebook, games – they’re soon going to ask what the kettle has to be so shrill about.

It’s a truly useless cynic who sees a dystopian future instead of a hopeful one. If we can manage to hand them the world without destroying it first, they may just be able to save it.

This is the latest installment in your editor’s column, The Insider’s Guide to Life, exploring topics such as media, culture, sex, politics, and anything else. Cheers and spellcheck!

Image: Zawezome

The post The Insider’s Guide to Life: Kids These Days appeared first on EcoSalon.