Body image after baby is a struggle for so many women. And while mine is still far from perfect, I’ve learned to appreciate, and even love, the one I have now.

My precise, detailed, handwritten birth plan was tucked neatly into an accordion file folder stashed away in my hospital bag. Nestled alongside it were toiletries (can’t forget my Nature’s Gate toothpaste and sulfate-free shampoo), a birthing gown, essential oils, a crossword puzzle (Seriously, Jamie?), extra clothes, my daughter’s going home outfit, and a bazillion other just-in-case things I could cram into the suitcase. We had the pamphlets, took the classes, knew the timing for contractions, and felt super prepared.

But, as in life, my entire plan was quickly blown to smithereens. And not just sort of. When labor finally happened I was progressing so fast for a first timer, that if we had listened to the on-call doctor, I would’ve had a home birth. So at seven centimeters dilated, and wearing the hospital-issued smock, someone finally wheeled me to a room. Once we arrived upstairs I was nine centimeters along, which gave me barely enough time to suck down some nitrous oxide, much less get an epidural. And even though I swore like a sailor, screamed bloody murder, and attempted to convince the nurse to give me some drugs and a C-section, much to my chagrin, the only thing that really went according to plan was my hope for a natural birth.

It’s been almost six months now since having my daughter, and one thing I’ve learned about being a parent is that absolutely, positively nothing goes as planned. Like, ever. In fact, similar to my delivery debacle, breastfeeding struggles, and dealing with more blow-out poopies than I care to remember, most things are just downright ludicrous.

So when I looked in the mirror after all of the stretching, drooping, and shifting, not to mention the sheer horror and loss of control that can only be instilled by the journey a pregnant body takes, and didn’t hate the reflection staring back at me, I was pleasantly surprised. As a few more weeks passed postpartum, I actually began to like my body (minus all the phantom pregnancy farts) even more than I ever thought possible.

1. I feel stronger

The sheer empowerment I felt after making it through hours of toe curling pain, pushing a tiny human out of my body, and doing it all naturally made me feel like Wonder Woman, dammit. And while that initial high is no longer lingering, my ability to power through breastfeeding issues, continue to work and care for my baby from home, and deal with the daily struggles that parenting presents, helps me to remember that if I can give birth, I can make it through anything.

2. I feel healthier

I may be a vegetarian, but before becoming pregnant, I didn’t always eat right. I skipped meals, chose quick, processed foods over fresh, was underweight, and committed all sorts of other nutritional sins. My pregnancy cravings were off the chain (I still cringe over the amount of gummy bears and Canada Dry ginger ales I consumed), and 32 pounds later, those yearnings, along with that niggling case of indigestion, finally disappeared.

However, when it came time to breastfeed, I wanted to consume the healthy calories my body required to feed my baby well. I ate better, slept as often as I could, tried to relax my mind more often, and actually feel just fine hanging onto those ten extra pounds.  

3. I feel sexier

My body’s curvier, my bust is fuller, my booty is squishier, and although things have definitely changed a tad down there, the boosted blood flow is out of this world. Some of these things may be temporary (I’ll miss you, big boobies), but I’ll be damned if I won’t enjoy them while they’re here. Filling out clothes is spectacular, and I’ve definitely enjoyed the extra cleavage.  

4. She deserves it

It’s not just about me anymore. Surrounded by sexism, stereotypes, impossible standards of beauty, social media, and so much more, I quickly realized that my position as the most idolized female role model in my daughter’s life is paramount. That is, until some pop singer swoops in on her wrecking ball and takes my place (please, sweet Jesus, be Taylor Swift). But until then, I need to present my baby girl with a positive-minded, self-loving, and confident mama with a body image to match.

Feeling good about myself is still an imperfect science. Just like anyone else, I have good days and bad, but my daughter serves as the best reminder of why I need to keep on appreciating the body I have.

How has your body image been since baby? Let us know your thoughts on the EcoSalon Facebook page!

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Baby, you may have been born this way. But that doesn’t mean you can’t encourage positive thinking and start to see things in a brighter way. Find out how top happiness gurus filter out negative junk. Spoiler: You can do this too!

“I tend to look at the glass half empty. Can’t help it, I was just born that way.” Sound familiar?

So maybe you were born with a less than rosy outlook on life. Sometimes being a pessimist comes in handy. Say, when you are sizing someone up for a job or trying to make a big decision.

That said, let’s not let the neggies get in the way of some good living. Even if you don’t tend toward pessimism, we all battle negative thoughts from time to time. Yes, even those high spirited, ultra-balanced health and lifestyle gurus whose stuff you read.

How do these seemingly always joyful people do it? They put regular effort into filtering out the negative crap that life hands us. Sure, there will always be tough spots in life to deal with. But we don’t need to go looking for them.

There is a stream of not-so-feel-good material you can hook into pretty much anytime of the day. Doubt it? Just hop on Facebook for a sec and see if you don’t come across something that gives you a little bit of ick factor. Seriously, I’ll wait…

How long did it take before you saw pics of a public figure doing something cringe-worthy? Or an acquaintance whose feed full of vigorous workouts, perfect home, and sky high achieving kids made you feel like making over your entire existence? Yep, thought so.

Not long ago, I was watching one of Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday episodes and she happened to mention that she asks her driver to shut off the radio when on her way to an interview or speaking engagement. As someone who has shunned news outlets for years now, my interest was piqued.

Oprah says she requests the quiet so that no news, music, or banter fills her head. She wants her own intentional thoughts filling her noggin, rather than a bunch of garbage she is involuntarily absorbing.

Our society loves news. It is available pretty much anytime, anywhere, and most of us eat it up. Have you noticed how the news networks relentlessly cover scary, sad, or bad news in graphic detail, when news about people helping others or somehow making a positive dent in this world of ours takes a backseat? It’s because people want to see the blood and guts, not the happy faces.

As screwed up as this seems, it is likely not changing anytime soon. What can change? Whether or not we take part.

And it is not just the scary and gory that messes with our positive thinking. Remember that FB friend we talked about? The one with the seemingly perfect life that makes you feel like you are doing it all wrong? That is also a form of allowing garbage to fill our heads.

Marie Forleo, business and lifestyle guru, calls this compare-schlager. As in, it is as toxic to the system and makes us feel just as bad as a Goldschlager (substitute Jagermeister, tequila, Fireball) binge did in college. Forleo goes on to call this inundation of feel bad info the “Hamburglar of Happiness”, and advises avoiding any social media, magazines, TV, etc. that makes you feel grossed out.

If thinking about all of this makes you feel even more stressed and negative, here’s good news. It is well within your control to not allow this junk into your life. If this means turning off the news and flipping on some HGTV, do it. If HGTV gives you house envy, turn on AMC or, even better, get some fresh air. Limit your exposure to Facebook or give it a break altogether.

The key here is this: Whatever it is that is making you feel bad, stop doing that and positive thinking will follow. I like Instagram because the pictures are pretty and most of the content is upbeat. Same with Pinterest. Find what makes you feel good and get more of that in your life. This not only gets the unconstructive stuff out of your head, but allows you more time and space to think about things that matter and will do you some actual good.

Hey, if it’s good enough for Oprah and Marie, it probably works for the rest of us.

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Dr. Wayne Dyer passed away over the weekend. While his passing is sad, his work will always be remembered.

To help us all remember just how important positive thinking is, we decided to post this short video featuring Dyer’s thoughts on the Law of Attraction.

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You know how a good dream makes you feel great? And a bad dream does the exact opposite? So what do dreams mean, and how can they help you kick negative thoughts to the curb and improve your life?

Sometimes they are seemingly random. Other times they are obviously about a life event or struggle. Have you considered what your dreams are telling you?

Some psychologists put a lot of stock in dreams, considering them higher forms of contemplation. Makes sense if you think of dreams as distraction free thought that is much more intuitive than our ordinary daily thoughts.

Not only are dreams interesting, but may be tools to a better life. By paying attention to what your mind is mulling over while you catch your Zs, you can unveil what’s troubling you, working for you, and even gain help in making decisions.

Carl Jung may have been one of the original believers, but dream symbolism is becoming increasingly popular. While dreams are as individual as the dreamer, there are certain themes that seem to run true. Jung disciple and psychotherapist, Carder Stout, recently did a fascinating interview with GOOP that went further into the dream/reality connection.

Stout says not only do our dreams connect with our subconscious, but with universal archetypes. For instance, those naked in public dreams that crop up from time to time? You may be feeling vulnerable or unprotected in some way. Dreaming of a scary woman, maybe even someone you know? This isn’t so much about them as you, representing a part of our own personality that we aren’t so crazy about. And every mother out there is likely familiar with the misplaced child nightmare. Guess what, that one is not a premonition of bad parenting, but a signal that you may be denying the childlike qualities in yourself and need to have more fun. What a relief!

Ready to delve deeper into your own psyche? Start by making notes on dreams in the morning and see if you can come up with real life connections that speak to you. Or type your dream character or symbol into DreamsCloud, a free app that shares insights and scenarios on dreams. Read up on dream interpretation with “Your Mind at Night: Dream Interpretation Guide for Beginners” by Frances Long and “Beginner’s Guide to Dream Interpretation: Uncover the Hidden Riches of Your Dreams with Jungian Analyst“.

Think of dreams as meditation while you sleep, opening up greater insight into the true you. What do you think? Interested in dream analysis?

*Disclaimer: Help support EcoSalon! Our site is dedicated to helping people live a conscious lifestyle. We’ve provided some affiliate links above in case you wish to purchase any of these products.

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If people telling you to think positively makes you want to vom… well, welcome to the club. Would you care for a half empty glass of water?

If I’m having a shit day, the last thing I want to hear is “everything’s going to be alright,” or “it could be worse,” or I need to “find the silver lining.” Just because my day wasn’t as bad as someone else’s doesn’t give anyone the right to trivialize my feelings and encourage me to be all kittens-and-sunshine during sucky moments in life.

If I was homeless, missing a limb, and a wheel just fell off my shopping cart, I can guarantee there’d be someone nearby to say, “At least you have a shopping cart.” I can also guarantee they’d end up under it.

Pessimism gets a bad rap, as if being a pessimist means you’re an unhappy, negative sourpuss who never sees the good in life—but this couldn’t be further from the truth. We’re just not fans of suppressing our dark side and pretending it doesn’t exist.

Called “defensive pessimism,” it’s a way to mentally and emotionally prepare for what might go wrong. You know, in case it does. Our mantra is, “Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.” We set lower expectations (but expectations, nonetheless), so that if something goes wrong, we can handle it like a boss—and if nothing goes wrong, we’re uber-grateful and take the time to celebrate.

If it weren’t for pessimism, we’d never evolve. We’d never set goals. We’d never learn from our mistakes. We’d never grow. Dissatisfaction fuels us forward. I mean, if we were supposed to think positively all the time then we would, no?

It’s important for us to be both positive and negative—if you’re having a good day, then say so. But if you’re not, don’t pretend you are. How are you supposed to make tomorrow better if you’re not acknowledging what’s wrong today? Case in point: Global warming. Your glass can’t be half full in an effing drought.

Here’s why you should always think positively about being a pessimist:

1. Pessimism = motivation

Sure, defensive pessimists have low expectations, but that also means you’re more likely to exceed them and thrive. Bam.

2. Pessimism decreases anxiety

The harder you try to ignore your negative thoughts, the more intense they become. If you’re feeling anxious about a particular situation, you can use defensive pessimism to prepare for the outcome you’re worried about and come out on top.

3. Pessimism gives you a leg up

Because you’re more prepared for what could go wrong, you’re more likely to have a back-up plan in place. After all, how is everything going to be alright unless you make it so?

4. Pessimism may help you live longer

Just because you plaster on a smile to ward off health issues typically linked to being a pessimist (like depression and heart disease) doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. In fact, a 2013 study found pessimists are more likely to live longer due to their cautious nature. So there.

How do you feel about positive thinking?

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We are all born with a unique temperament. Most of us naturally sway toward either positive thinking or negative thinking. Which state you spend most of your time in can affect your life. And your health.

Studies have shown that your thoughts, and whether they are optimistic or pessimistic, affect your health and well being. Are you a glass half empty kind of person by nature? The good news…you can change that negative way of thinking and learn to be more positive.

Positive mental attitude, or PMA, is shown to hold mega health benefits. It reduces stress, boosts immunity, reduces risk of heart disease, lowers chance of depression, improves coping skills, and could even increase your life span. How about that for a list of kudos?

For those who veer toward the positive end of the spectrum this is good news. By making a few adjustments to their thoughts and retraining their frame of mind, those who tend to look at things in a more negative light can also reap these amazing advantages.

First, let’s get something straight. Developing PMA does not mean you hide out in denial. Not even the most sunny amongst us are positive all the time. We are not talking constantly upbeat and happy, happy, happy. It’s more about perception and expecting a good outcome. That is the real goal here. Difficulties and annoyances are going to come up in life. It is how you deal with them that is important.

A study on the effects of positive thinking on heart patients shows that an upbeat outlook is essential in improving long term health. Those with a more optimistic attitude tend to have more energy and confidence, which means they are more apt to eat right, exercise and take care of themselves in general.

But can positive thoughts help you in ways other than motivating you toward a healthy lifestyle? Experts say they can. The placebo effect has proven it is so. While it may be largely up to the individual, an average of 30 percent of people who are given a placebo by a doctor in studies report a positive response to the “medication”. Of course, a sugar pill cannot do anything to you physically. It is the mind telling you that you feel better. However, we cannot placebo ourselves. If we give ourselves a sugar pill we are on to it. It does not have the same effect as when delivered by a doctor.

Still, this mind body connection is hard to deny. Many experts, like Deepak Chopra, believe the mind has the power to heal. Chopra advises relaxing the mind to a more peaceful state, rather than constantly trying to think positive thoughts. He advocates meditation as a great way to calm the mind and gain focus.

Positive thinking is a powerful tool in prevention of disease. It also helps you to enjoy the moment, take things as they come, and set desired results in motion.

Of course, there are skeptics. Some professionals believe there is no significant health benefit to a positive outlook. This is something you will have to decide for yourself. Either way, it certainly feels better to enlist a little PMA.

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