Are you too green for your own good? I’ve become so eco-conscious that I fear I’m annoying; like those supermarket ladies who serve up unsolicited advice to parents while their toddler is having a tantrum.
The first clue that I might be going overboard was when I realized that every coat pocket, handbag, and backpack had two of those small nylon reusable bags
tucked inside of them. Next, I noticed that a collection of BPA-free aluminum bottles had accrued in my kitchen cabinet. I began to snap at my husband if he didn’t properly separate every piece of paper to recycle, and would glare if he mail-ordered something that we could have found locally.
But when things started to go beyond the confines of our home, I should have realized that a problem was brewing. When my friend hit a Starbucks I nearly hissed at the poor barista because they don’t recycle the plastic cups, and last year I was way too close to getting surly with my neighbor when she pulled up in her new SUV that could house a small country.
Eco snobbery happens. Don’t let it happen to you! The warning signs:
1. Instead of giving out candy on Halloween you hand out compact fluorescent light bulbs.
2. You recently printed out 50 copies (on recycled paper) of the “worst cars for the environment” and your idea of a fun night was placing them under an offender’s windshield.
3. The last time you went to a friend’s house for dinner you made mental notes then on the way out, then presented them with a list of ways they can better green their home.
4. You sneer at anyone with a Zappos box in their trash because their “Free Shipping Both Ways” platform surely encourages people to buy three sizes of the same shoe, then ship back the others.
5. You’re guilty of spending your spare time playing with a carbon footprint calculator.
6. When you babysat for your neighbor’s 6-year-old you made her watch An Inconvenient Truth.
7. You’ve decided to postpone your New Year’s party until 1-20-09.
8. The last time you were at a family picnic you washed all of the plastic flatware.
9. You’ve replaced local movie listings from your toolbar with Green Meet Ups – and added a 60 mile radius.
10. A new colleague sincerely thought your last name was Evangelist.
If you’ve answered yes to more than three of the above, you’re sure to help save the earth, but you’ll be doing it alone!
Image: thomieh (not actually a snob)
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