Got problems with your family, your boss, or your co-workers? Who doesn’t? Conflict and disagreement are natural parts of life; what really matters is how you choose to deal with them. Tonglen is one incredibly personal tool for dealing for difficult circumstances.

Tonglen meditation has been in practice since at least the 10th century. It’s particularly empowering because it gives you an opportunity to imagine yourself actively changing a situation with the power of your heart. Here’s how it was taught to me.

Close your eyes and breathe; take a moment to get into your space and your body.
Visualize someone or something you have difficulties with (even an aspect of your own self) seated in front of you, facing you.
See the dark clouds of conflict and suffering surrounding the person seated in front of you.
Visualize yourself breathing in those dark clouds and bringing them into your heart.
In your heart, transform the darkness into light and exhale that light onto the difficulty in front of you.
Keep doing this breathing visualization until that which is facing you is surrounded by light.

Tonglen is a great meditation if you are having trouble forgiving someone, or if you know someone who is ill and want to send them energetic healing. The power of this practice is that it takes you out of victim mode by empowering you to choose healing and transform a perceived darkness into light. Let us know how it works for you!

Image: Jakub Hia